I Don't Understand

You used to ask me why I said that
Or why I did that.
And I used to say,
'To make you get annoyed'
Or 'So you would shout at me'
But it wasn't true..
I think I said that or did that
Because it just happened.
It would have been helpful
If I could have looked ahead and predicted
the reaction I would get.
But there wasn't really time.
these things just happen in an instant.
Someone says something vaguely confrontational
And you take the bait.
You are sucked in.
You don't stop to think of the consequences.
You think there was an injustice.
You defend yourself.
You say something which is bound to make things Worse rather than better.
And before you know it, there's a full-scale row
And afterwards it doesn't help if you still think
You are right.
Because she does, too.
And you've both hurt each other.
You should be able to see it coming
You should have spotted a pattern by now.
And you won't feel any better
Even if you win.
So, why not avoid the argument in the first place?