A hundred moments in autism - The Whale Cafe revisited
By Terrence Oblong
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The Whale Cafe revisited
I’m back in the lunch queue at the Whale Cafe.
Now you may be thinking, that as I regularly get my lunch at the Whale Cafe, I must eat my lunch at the Whale Cafe, under the skeleton of the great big whale.
I don’t.
I buy a sandwich to go, and go. I am out of there, alone with not so much as a whale for company.
“Let’s do lunch” is not an expression that trips off my lips. I lunch alone except in very exceptional circumstances – mostly weddings and funerals.
It’s not that I'm anti-social per se, it’s just that I really don’t like eating food with other people. Eating with others is complex, when to speak, what to say, what is the appropriate ratio between speaking and eating, for how long a period complete silence is acceptable, how soon do I need to respond if asked a question just as I’m taking a bite, is eye contact required as I need to look at my food while I'm eating it. And that’s avoiding the issue of non verbal conversation. That’s difficult enough at any time, without factoring in cutlery and foodstuff.
When I’m hungry I want to eat, and when I want to eat I want to eat, not talk. Which is why I eat alone.
I do eat with Mrs Oblong, however. Mrs Oblong knows me well enough to tolerate my every oddity.
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'I really don't like eating
'I really don't like eating food with other people.' Same here. Even the cat has to turn away.
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