Persian Rug Sale At The URC

Hesketh was enjoying being on the planning committee for the Persian rug sale. He was new to the church and to the area, and this was a good opportunity both to meet people and show his worth. He was involved in liaising with the wholesaler and designed the posters, which he also put up around town.
 
All seemed to be going smoothly, when the minister, Rev Dawson, made an announcement at the next planning meeting.

"Bad news I'm, afraid. The Congregational Church are organising a Persian rug sale on the same day as ours."

"They can't possibly be doing a Persian rug sale," said Harrison, another member of the committee. "I mean churches never have Persian rug sales."

"They must be copying us," agreed Rev Dawson. We'll just have to work harder to make our rug sale a success."

However, the next when Hesketh walked through the town, all of his rug sale posters were all gone, replaced by posters for the Congregational Church sale of Persian rugs.  He told Rev Dawson.

"Oh they always do that, it's like all out war with the CC. I'll print off some more posters and you can tear down theirs."

"Surely neither church benefits from this sort of petty feuding."

"That's hardly the point, Hesketh. The rivalry goes back decades, my father ripped down CC posters as did his father before him. I'm expecting my grandchildren to do exactly the same."

Despite the frustrations with posters and the competition from the congregational church the rest of the planning went well, with lots of promised to attend the even on facebook and a noticeable increase in website traffic as a consequence of the event.

On the day of the sale all was set up and the first few customers trickled into the church.

"I wonder what the CC are doing," said Harrison.

"We can hardly go and see," said the Reverend, "They've made it quite plain that we're not welcome there."

"You're new Hesketh," said Harrison, "Why don't you pop over and take a look."

"What am I looking for?"

"Rugs, Hesketh. Number, quality, prices, popularity.  We are asking you to compare rug sale with rug sale."

"I feel like a spy."

"That's because we're asking you to be a spy, Hesketh. But don't worry, it's all part of god's divine plan."

Hesketh left, wondering if it really was part of god's divine plan to have two churches organise rival Persian rug sales. He strolled carefully around the Congregational Church, making mental notes of the rugsale layout, prices, quality, etc. 

"Well?" said Harrison upon his return.

"They've got a good selection of rugs, a variety of colours, patterns and sizes. They are quite a bit cheaper than ours."

"How much cheaper?"

"It's hard to compare exactly, but I'd say about 20% cheaper on average."

"Right, get a sign made, 25% off all rugs, special sale price."

"Can we afford to do that?

"We're not being undercut by the CC." 

As they were talking Hesketh recognised a woman, who browsing round their sale. She was one of the sales staff at the Congregational Church. She shows no inclination to buy anything and seems to be taking careful note of stock and prices.  When she's finished Hesketh followed her out of the URC.

"Are you spying on us?" 

"Who me?" said the woman. "No. Why would you think that? You've never seen me before, I'm new in town."

"So am I.  I saw you earlier, the URC sent me over to look at your rugs."

"Is that why you've cut all the prices by 25%?"

Yes, please don't tell your bosses, they'll cut their prices, then we'll have to cut ours again and we'll all end up making a loss."

Yes, we're barely breaking as it is at the moment. This rivalry is so stupid."

"What if you tell your bosses that the URF prices are 50% higher and that they're selling a similar rate to you."

"Ah, so we raise our prices."

"Exactly, and I report this back and we end our 25% off sale."

"That way we'll both be making a profit on our rug sales. Otherwise it's a waste of everyone's time."

"Nice doing business with you," Hesketh said. She held out her hand which he shook politely.

"I'm Hesketh," said Hesketh.

"I'm Donna," said the woman. 

"Oh, in which case I'm Jack."

"Hello Jack Hesketh. Nice to meet you." 

"You know, this rivalry is all a bit silly. Why don't the two of us work together to stop this petty bickering."

"I like that idea. Why don't we start working together at the St George at 7.30. I hear it's curry and chips night."

"Are you asking me on a date?" 

"Could be. You'll only know if you turn up won't you?"