You've gotta walk the dog

"At the end of the day, you have to walk the dog, or what sort of person are you?"

"Absolutely true, Dave," said Jack. "Daft Vader here goes bonkers if he's not been out, all scratching at the door and whining."

"Any other time, of course I'd have gone with herself to see her mother in hospital, but dogs don't walk themselves."

"They got robots now," said Ted.

"What, robot dogs? I wouldn't want one of them."

"No, I mean robots that walk your dog for you."

"What, they cross the road and everything?"

"Apparently."

"But how does that work?" said Dave. "What's to stop the dog running off?"

"They're on a lead. The robot must be strong enough to stop the dog running off, I suppose."

"But what about when the dog stops to do its business? How does the robot know to let it stop and not drag it along?"

"I don't know. I didn't say I'd invented a robot dog-walker, I said you can get 'em."

"Jane'll want one of those," said Jack. "'Why d'you have to go out every night, leaving me to put the kids to bed?'"

"She say that? Seriously. Don't she know you gotta walk a dog, or it's cruelty."

"I told her, and she says 'I know all about your walk'."

"What's she mean by that?"

"Don't know. 'nother pint Ted?"

"Na, gotta go, Tiny here hasn't done his business yet and he's getting a bit restless."

"Oh well, when you gotta walk the dog you gotta walk the dog."

"See you both tomorrow?"

"I suppose so, unless Lassie here learns to walk herself."

"Or unless Jane get's one of those robot dog-walkers."