When our baby was four months old, one of the main stories in the news was the MMR vaccine, and the Doctor who said it causes Autism!
My Husband and I sat on the sofa with our precious little boy between us and we said we would never let him have it! Never!
We don't usually agree on most things, but with this we were like one soul! Daniel was very dear to us having waiting SO long for him to eventually arrive, now he was here and in good health, strong and happy.
Many people had said they had a 'normal' child and within twenty four hours after taking the MMR injection they had a different child. Yet there was no compensation offered, for it was not acknowledged by the medical professional.
They said it was worse in boys. They said it can give them tummy problems too. You only get once chance with your baby, mistakes can't be rectified, with something like the MMR.
My Husband Paul, who always turns a conversation round to whatever you are talking about to dogs, one of his favourite subjects in the world, said to me and to others, “You wouldn't give a puppy all that amount of medication all at once, so why give it all together in one go for a baby?” Good Point!
So each time that he was offered the MMR we said, “No thank you” The medical person would always ask, “Why?” And we would always refer back to the news story, and the Doctor who was told he was wrong to frighten the general public with his findings. But we were not against the injections themselves but the fact that they were all together, to save money.
Occasionally, I would ask other Mothers if their child has had the vaccine and most would say, “Yes” And I would always ask, “But why?” And they would reply, “It's important that my child is protected” I would ask if they were not worried about their child getting autism, they always replied, “No, that can't happen” but Paul and I would never forget the news story at the time when our little Daniel was four months.
Daniel has always been sensitive to certain things, I remember one day he had a spot appear on his chest I took him to the Doctor who was new to our surgery and he said he had something SO catching that we would all need to be treated!!!!!!!!!!!! I knew he was wrong. So on my way out, I booked to see a proper Doctor my own, at the same surgery the following day. When she looked at the spot on Daniels chest she said, “He is allergic to something, it will be gone in a few days.” Then I told her what the new Doctor had said it was yesterday, she been professional said, “It isn't what he has said, and the spot will be gone in a few days, something has disagreed with him.” She was right, a few days later the spot on his chest went, and we the rest of his family caught nothing like the silly new Doctor had said!
Seven years ago, Daniel had the worse allergic spots we had ever seen! He woke up one morning with spots on his chest just a few, so I took him to the Doctor with a note that I had written before I left the house, it read, “I think my Son has got Measles, please can we see a Doctor, please don't say it aloud so all can hear in the waiting room” she read the note and put my Son and me in another smaller waiting room from the main one. In this room there was a large poster encouraging the vaccine MMR. And tears filled my eyes and I thought, have I left it too late? Why didn't I have it done for Daniel, what's going to happen to him now? Paul had mentioned the MMR for both our children about 5 months before but I had totally dismissed it! I reminded him of the dangerous, that they don't change, no compensation would be given for it is not recognised by any medical profession! Now here I was, face to face with this retched thing again.
When we went in to see the Doctor, after about a 20 minute wait, for we had no appointment, and I lift up his top, the Doctor was SO shocked by what he saw that he moved back suddenly on his chair with wheels and said, “WOW!” then he composed himself and returned to his desk, indeed I too was shocked for the spots had multiplied lots as we waited in the the other smaller room. I bit the bullet and asked if it was measles, he said, “No he is allergic to something” I said the only thing that I can thing of that I have recently used different is bio-washing powder and fabric conditioner with his clothes usually I use non-bio and no fabric conditioner. During the days that followed, (I wished we had taken photos of it) after about two days the spots would disappear from where they were the following day, not a spot could be seen and would appear somewhere else on his body! So the spots that covered his chest 100% went after two days and was on both buttocks the following morning! Then after his buttocks, they came on his arms, then this back, even the soles of his feet, when it was nowhere else on his body! He was given antihistamine, as there is SO many medication he is allergic to! I wrote them down in his baby book, the ones that brought spots to him, gave him bad runs etc. for future reference! I even told my lovely Doctor that he is allergic to Penicillin, he said, “I had to be careful saying that,” I told him, “its true and I had written down Daniels side affects after taking it and the dates.” He got over his spots, and life carried on.....
The Paul mentioned the MMR again that he wanted the children to have it now as they were old enough to cope with it!!! I was devastated! We both loved our kids and wanted only what was the very best for them. If, I thought I was a single Parent I wouldn't be having this stress or conversation, for it would be “No, for life!” But it was good that there was two Parents, which I suppose gives balance, and not just one point of view. I didn't like what Paul suggested, but he was entitled to his opinion, even thou he was wrong! For we can't play with our kids health, we only get one change to do things and if we make the wrong choices as Parents, who could we blame, but ourselves. For it was our job to protect our kids, the professionals didn't care. It would always be no for me. But the subject would not go away.
I had cried a lot about it, and one day I said to myself, I will ask twenty people I know, it will include those with young children, Nurses I know in my family, people I trust and love deeply if I should allow our children to have the MMR vaccine, for I don't want them to ever have it, that I can't stop crying over it and that Paul wants them to have it that I will be asking twenty people and I WILL go with the majority of their replies.
So I asked my Deputy at work and I knew he had a Son so I asked him if his Son had been given the MMR, he replied, “Yes” I asked him if he was not worried about the affects of the vaccine he replied, “No for the risks, were too small not to give him,” and he added, which didn't help, the the risks of autism was worse in boys!!!
I asked Nurses who I know very well in my family and those at my place of Worship they said it was safe to give, they too had given it to their child. So I asked twenty Parents all I knew very well and their lovely children, so how many said yes, it was safe, their child had been given the MMR nineteen! And one said, “it was my choice, only I could make.” I said to them all, “Behind my eyes in 100% water, for the tears are all there ready to pour out” they told me not to worry all would be well, I wished I could believe them all but they had passed through the 'difficult' decision, that we had delayed and put off. I even told some how Daniel is allergic to so many things, what would THIS do to him???
I even read in the Bible, from Psalm 91 one of my favourite chapters, “I will protect those who trust in My Name.” Somewhere, somehow I HAD to trust I had to let go!!! And let the children have the MMR the majority had given their advice to me in love and respected my fears which was real. I was very afraid, to say the least, I had to let them have the vaccine. So a date was set, I would be with them. Then Daniel had a cold so it was cancelled, I saw it as a good sign, and a reprieved and a sign for them not to have it, then another date was set six years ago in May I was at work when Paul took them both. I prayed with them that morning that they would be kept safe, and there was nothing else I could do.......
They had the MMR vaccine. Thank God they were fine. But if someone asked my advice in the future, I would say “I am not for it, my kids have had it and they had no ill affects at all after having it, it is your choice that only you can make, my views on the subject is still, no.”