When I was in my early teens and Mother's Day was near, I would always buy my Mum CHOCOLATES!!! For I knew she wouldn't eat them, but give them to us! So I loved Mother's Day.
When I was older around early twenties and early thirties, I hated Mother's Day! My place of worship would always hand out little bunches of daffodils or little pot plants for all female over sixteen. But that little kind gesture hurt me deep, for it reminded me of what I didn't have and SO longed for, a baby! And without a Husband I couldn't have one. Mother's Day was the worst day of the year for me as a single woman, it was even worse than Valentine's Day! And I hated that day too.
On some of the Sundays, when the dreaded, flowers were handed out at the front, for they had to be collected for the smiling, happy person at the front, everyone was happy except me, I just wanted to cry! Some of my close friends who knew I didn't like this day and why would say to me, “Come with us Grace” for they knew I was drawing more attention to myself sitting there glum, and sometimes I went and sometimes I didn't, either way it went in the bin at home. My friends too were single but everyone is different, and handles things in their own ways.
I really wanted a Husband but wherever my place of worship was, it always seem there was one hundred girls to five lads! I think that's how it is in most places of worship!!! I don't think its ever the other way round.
I never got over the Mother's Day flowers at my place of worship, while I was single.
Eventually I got married. And many years later I had a son. When he was four months old he went to hospital, I slept on a little sofa bed in his hospital room, all the baby wards at this hospital was like that rows of little glass rooms with a baby cot and a little bed for the parent. The following day was my first Mother's Day as a Mummy, my Husband came to visit us and I said, “Where is my Mother's Day gift and card?” He said, he didn't think it mattered as Daniel was so small, and he didn't know about Mother's Day! I was devastated!!! And with tears said, “You know I have waited for this day, all my life, and you got me nothing?” Only God knew how I felt that day! So my first Mother's Day was not a good one. The following day, as Daniel was still in hospital and I was still with him, Paul brought me as a Mother's Day gift, it was six cream Easter eggs in its own special little egg box. I was angry and determined not to eat them but to save them for his first Father's Day in June a few months later!!! But as Daniel was SO ill and I was stuck in there, I ate one and that was it the others got eaten too. I didn't treat Paul as he deserved, for from Daniel I got him a camcorder, this is going back years and I had almost now forgotten what they were called! I hadn't forgotten, how I felt months before, when I handed it to him, from Daniel. He loved his gift and card. The following year, he didn't make the same mistake!!!!!
And now? As we don't go out for meals often, as we can't afford it, we go to my favourite place to eat in the whole wide world!!!!! I LOVE it there ….... its a buffet and you can eat what you like, and how much and how little, the price, and it's not dear, remains the same. So we are booked in to go there on the 10th of March in a few days.
I used to think when I was young, that my Mum and all Mums were very special, for most of them put others first! They work day and night, they look after the home and make lovely healthy meals! I used to think I could never be as good as my Mum! She worked nights all of my life until she retired, she would, Fridays from work go straight to the market, come home cook our lovely meals and then go to bed!!! And would be going to work that night. When came home from school and Dad from work, all our meals were ready! Even when she fasted you couldn't tell the meals, the dinners, were even tastier! I remember once asking her, why she wasn't eating, it was then she told me she was fasting! No one else knew in the house, but that's my Mummy for you. I'm not as 'good' as my Mummy, for we live in a different time, for I work days so we are all out, and there is a lot more 'choice' in the shops, and Paul and I both do the cooking, which makes sense. I had a secret cleaner once for two years, Paul didn't know, so suddenly the house was perfect and all the clothes ironed!!! But then the factory closed down and he found out and stopped it! So as I am not Superwoman the house is 'OK' now we do the housework together or he does his bit and I do mine, together the house is a home.
Not all of my friends got married. So I remember them on certain days like Valentine's Day and Mother's Day, for I remember what it was like to be single, and so because they have no Husband they have no kids either. It's not an easy world that we live in, there are lots of 'hidden pain' that people you and I work with or go to the same place of worship, you may not know them well, but be kind. Remember them too in your prayers.
At times, the kids are a pest and my Husband too, but I wouldn't have it any other way! I'm sure if asked, he'd say I'm the biggest pest in the house!
Don't give up for those still hoping, I've been there, and even when I eventually got married it took years for Daniel to arrive.
Happy Mother's Day. Xxxx