Dorian Zenn: The Galaxy's Greatest Detective

Outside an abandoned dockside warehouse, a black saloon car pulled up with a screech and out got three burly men in trench coats and dark glasses; two of whom were lugging large, heavy suitcases.

“Gee, the boss is going to be really happy with this haul”, said one while one of his colleagues opened up a door at the front of the warehouse.

“I hope so”, said the man opening the door, “Because I don’t want him to do to me what he did to little Louis”.

“Yeah”, said the first, “I couldn’t believe it though I saw it with my own eyes; he just swallowed the poor guy whole”.

But then, from inside the gloomy warehouse, they heard a deep echoing, alien voice.

“About time”, it said, “Have you brought me the goods? I am hungry”.

Then, out of the darkness, towards them, came their boss; a giant floating mouth into whom they then began tipping the contents of the suitcases; a heap of glittering necklaces, rings, bangles and other golden jewellery.

“More, more”, it said as, drooling, it guzzled down the stolen items, greedily.

“There isn’t anymore”, said one of the crooks, starting to tremble nervously, afraid that he might end up being swallowed just like the glittering loot.

The  mouth gave a loud burp.

“Very well”, it said, “But next time I expect an even bigger haul.. understand?”.

Just then,however, high above the warehouse and drifting across the clear blue summer sky, a large white cumulus cloud that had followed the gang of crooks all the way from the scene of the crime suddenly began to melt and transform into the fabulous shape shifting ship of Dorian Zenn; the galaxies greatest consulting detective who, listening through his ships long range sonic x-ray device, had overheard the gang of crooks whole conversation.

“So that’s why they stole those jewels”, said Dorian, sitting at the controls of his hovering ship, “To feed it to that floating, mouth shaped fiend; a Gobling from the planet Scoff, judging by its accent. They only eat gold and jewels and that one has somehow mind controlled those two goons into stealing for him”.

But then, bringing his ship to land beside the crooks car; the alien detective pressed an ejector switch on the console in front of him and, the roof of his ship gliding open with a whir, he sprang out of his ship before, performing a triple somersault in mid-air, he landed cat like upon the ground below.

“What?”, said the mouth like alien criminal, somehow sensing the presence of the detective, “It’s Dorian Zenn, the galaxies greatest meddling dogooder; seize him you gang of nincompoops; destroy him”.

And, all at once Zenn was surrounded by the Mouths scowling henchmen, angrily wielding crowbars which they intended to pummel him with.

Fortunately, Zenn always wore his chameleonic gloves which gave him the properties of whatever they touched and, reaching out and pressing two of his six fingers against the concrete warehouse wall, he instantly became as hard as concrete so that the men’s crowbars did nothing but get bent out of shape as they were swung against his green skinned alien head and then, using the ancient alien art of Sci-Fu, a movement known as the whirling hurricane; spinning round he rendered each of the men insensible with only a single blow.

“Drat you, Zenn”, said the mouth, swallowing itself so that it disappeared into thin air, “You haven’t heard the last of me”.

But then, levitating himself back into the pilot seat his shape shifting ship; the detective transformed the ship into a gigantic earth mover and, scooping up the mouths dazed and bewildered henchmen in its shovel, carried them to the nearest police station before dumping them in front of some very surprised police officers.

“Wow”, said a police seargent, shaking Zenns alien six fingered hand, “It’s not every day we get crooks delivered to us”.

“Well”, replied Zenn, “It’s not every day that they run into the Galaxy's greatest detective”.