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Original

Alternative retelling of biblical creation myth

Potato Haiku

Poor cold potatoes not wanting to be eaten keep their jackets on

Mc Donald's Firm

Old McDonald had a Firm Knee pie, knee pie, toe And in that Firm he had a pig Knee pie, knee pie, toe With a Pig Mac here, a Pig Mac there A Porker...

Life Cycle

AWAKE! Asleep AWAKE! Asleep AWAKE! Asleep ASLEEP A Wake

Krucifixation

If you go across the sea to Ireland If you go across the Irish Sea You'll find all the sorrow of that island In the figure of a Cross the Irish see.

John Wayne Rides Again

(John Wayne Bobitt is making a porno film) She had a sharp tongue That slashed as she kissed Cut a long story short With a flick of her wrist She...

Into Danger

(after Fenton)

Hands

We depend on them like masters depend on servants. We pay them little respect. Yet they are our probes, our ciphers, our tests. These hands long for...

Greenfingers

Plant mindseeds in the morning Water them with rainrhymes Feed them on sunstrands Pluck thoughtflowers tonight

E: Applause for Effete

They speak him here They speak him there They speak about him everywhere... That Senile DelinQuentin Crisp! (A Pause For Effect) The Truth Fairy

Martin's Day Out

Character piece
Cherry

Floundering

You've split the north and south of me and set my compass whirling I flounder in uncharted seas and unknown constellations you've turned the world...

Dead Poets Society

In a musty attic I found a poem Written 100 years ago By a young girl, Long dead: Short is the day Of the loving heart. It read. And you, Standing in...

Comic Cuts

'Ha! ha! baa!' 'Hoo! hoo! moo!' Giggles in the abbatoir... Someone's chopped the 'S' off Slaughter House.

Beatnick Physics

E=MC is for squares, Man.

Alchemist (Chap. 1)

What is the Alchemist&;#063;

Alacrymose

There's a little bottle in the canteen labelled Emergency Eyewash for use when there's no managers about to dish it out by the gallon.

CHRISTMAS COMES BUT ONCE A YEAR

the secret life of a small boy and his grandfather

I miss you (come back)

So in love I can't get you out of my mind!

Dirt

please pass me a tissue to soak up this hurt its falling from my eyes and into the dirt

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