After the Goldrush and Before the Hurricanes (and the Floods, Fires and Aircraft Disasters!) by Alfred N.Muggins

19/4/25
    Who would have thought that 55 years after the great Canadian’s famous album (Neil Young) America would be wrestling with such a scourge as Donald (mafia boss!?) Trump and his billionaire backers. They nearly shot themselves in the foot as the clown they had selected to be the Great Leader tested out his preschool economic fantasies upon an unsuspecting world economy. America, the once great, was jarred by his tariff experiments, as he tried to chastise the other children in the playground for selling America too many of their goods. Somehow that was Canada’s fault for having too many trees and too much electricity which America wanted to consume. And Mexico was exporting far too many manufactures into America’s heart.

   But the Great Fool’s greatest ire was saved for China. How dare they sell all those goods to the precious rustbelt of America and demand the aircraft orders back from Boeing! Even as he pretended magnanimously to lower the tariffs on most of the world back down to only 10% now, he viciously put the heavy brakes on to trade with China, destroying jobs recklessly as he went, and putting consumer ‘s prices through the roof, while nonchalantly crashing the Great Car America into its trade imbalances. Has Donald Trump ever driven a car, we wonder? He certainly ain’t showing much competence in driving an economy into its crash barriers. The cost of buying government bonds went dangerously up. We can’t afford these loans, he was suddenly informed. Reduce speed to avoid a crash and he was obliged to bring most of the tariffs back down to 10%!

    And now the Bankers are controlling Canada and Donald is going to have to listen to the warnings a little bit, for now at least. But that won’t save the American economy, they are now entering choppy waters because no one wants to buy their goods any more. Everyone wants to be self sufficient now, because none of them want to put up with his childish bullying trade deals.

Trump’s Grandfather, the German, went to the Goldrush in Canada’s Yukon, turning to running stores, an inn and making lots of money out of the miners, so Trumpenstein does have some kind of personal claim to Canada in a sense. After the Goldrush the family transferred into property development in the early 20th Century. 

    Trump trashed the stock market by setting high tariffs on his neighbours and his erstwhile friends. Expectations of profit plummeted in the chaos, as chaos is very bad for confidence, but to him and some of his richer colleagues it was a chance to make some unearned profits. Some of them sold shares while they were valued high, and bought them after the fall. Then Trump changes his mind and decides to lower the tariffs for now

Alfred has suddenly realized it wasn’t just America which was supplying all that beautiful music to him all those years. Nearly half of it was Canadian, not purely American that’s for sure. Neil Young himself, and Joni Mitchell, and of course Rush and Max Webster, and the Guess Who. So many of them were actually Canadian, even his wife’s favourite Shania Twain turns out to be Canadian! And one other of Crosby Stills Nash and Young was British, from Manchester, or somewhere nearby at least, Graham Nash . They weren’t all Americans. So will the real Americans please stand up?

And by all accounts it was the less educated southern redneck man who particularly voted for Trumpenstein.
Look at mother nature on the run in the 1970’s! Well you should look at mother nature on the run in the 2020’s! Trump’s in power and he doesn’t even believe there is global warming, and it certainly won’t be stopping him or his business allies from ignoring it completely while they make their money. He’s going to drill baby drill, and he’s already signed the executive orders firing the National Park workers, and opening up the national Parks to developers who wish to chop down the forests and pollute the rivers.