Just Another April Fool by Alfred N.Muggins

It was April 1st 2025. In this age of fake news he should take care, in case he be conned, but what did that really matter, in the big scheme of things. Donald Trump was already in the White House, busily dismantling all the checks and balances on his own powers, and taking America’s multiracial society backwards more than 50 years! A younger, and therefore more trusting family member (son in law) rang up as he enjoyed his lie in. ‘Oh no,’ he thought, ‘not another driving lift request?’ But no, it was just for a chat about his relative’s favourite fast food chain, or perhaps he should say more accurately, the Grandkids’ favourite fast food chain. When the grandkids would not agree to go out for a pub meal, this fast food chain would always trump all others. The older grandchild from that family, now almost coming of age at 17, had been just the same ‘McDonalds or nothing’. (it must run in that branch of the family, or perhaps all kids and even teenagers were the same, liking that particular chain. Well McDonalds must have been doing something right over these years!
   Apparently due to tough economic forecasts and conditions, due to the economic uncertainties engineered by Donald Trump, and quite likely his tariffs, McDonalds was selling up its franchises and going back to the states. Alfred was still feeling fairly sleepy and was waking slowly, so he hadn’t entirely got his thinking cap on yet, although he had by now been on facebook for quite a while, carefully monitoring the situation day to day, and watching and waiting for signs of resistance or fightback, to the complacent and malign power of Trumpenstein and Musk, and deliverance from the fatal blows he and his colleagues seemed to be delivering to America, Democracy, Ukraine and the whole western world, Law and Order, both constitutional and international, and even Palestine.
    Given the doom laden news and the sad memes he continually scrolled and sometimes shared to others Alfred was well disposed to hearing and imagining the worst about America, including its companies, at the moment. So Alfred readily accepted that McDonalds was selling up and going back to America, and he expressed great sadness that this should be yet another ripple effect of Trump’s cruel Presidency. Now he was hurting British kids and teenagers, and even their parents, by closing their favourite fast food chain. Where would those grandchildren go now for their special treat meals?
    Suddenly, after keeping a remarkably even voice, son in law revealed his story was a hoax, it had all been one big April Fools joke, and who was the biggest April Fool? As usual it was Alfred, ernest Alfred, totally taken in by fake news! As always he had to admit he had been genuinely fooled, pre primed for bad news, and bad economic news at this dangerous time. He had been distracted, like so many, by the fear towards and the shock of Trump’s ‘success’, or failure, which is what it really was.
    As Alfred spotted son in law’s facebook meme, marking the success of his April Fool’s Day joke, Alfred commented with a counter joke, even though by then it was well after midday, that the Mc was going to be taken off the name as the fast food chain was rebranded as ‘Donald’s’ for Donald Trump! (of course they even had a branch/franchise in Moscow, quite appropriately given Trump’s increasingly obvious connections with Putin and Russian propaganda!)