To my neighbors

Dear sir or madam,

I hope this letter finds you well, and I would like to apologize in advance for any distress its delivery may cause. This is a message, that I just had to give you. Unfortunately, the only means of its conveyance left to me, was sliding it in the doors mail slot. I tried knocking earlier, but no one answered, even though there are several cars in the driveway. Perhaps this is a good thing, for now, you will have a tangible reminder of my thoughts. Since I am, most likely, unknown to you. I would like to share a little information about myself, so that you might better understand the weight of my words. In the house, and time, I was raised, manners were of great importance. I was taught to treat everyone with courtesy and respect, and to place a high value on their privacy. Although, I must confess to the occasional harsh thought. And the knowledge, of the existence, of several vulgar words. I try not to express them. In doing so, I believe, I not only lessen myself, but also the unfortunate person I share them with. So now that you, hopefully, have some small understanding of where I am coming from. I would now like to say this - Turn down the FUCKING music, you SHIT!

Gratefully yours,

George from next door

P.S. Earlier while I was knocking on the door, it seems my dog found the motivation to, vigorously, answer nature's call on the front lawn. Apologies once again, and thank you kindly for your time.

P.P.S. Depending on who reads this, it might be known that I do not actually have a dog.