The rules of combat 10/10

Jennifer Jane had left the blacksmith at Lurgin's bridge and gone to talk to the troll. She went down the riverbank and looked under the bridge.

"Hello Gordon," she said.

"Er hello miss, er I don't think this is quite right, shouldn't you be on top of the bridge waiting for me to ask you a riddle?"

"That's what I've come to see you about," said Jennifer Jane, " go on ask me a riddle."

"Oh ..er right." Gordon looked round desperately, the only piece of paper under the bridge was his leaflet, 'A Basic Guide for Trolls. "There don't seem to be any," he said at last.

"That's right," said Jennifer Jane, "they all got lost when Lurgin was killed. Now if you don't want to become unpopular and get killed yourself, may I suggest that you collect riddles from the people who want to cross your bridge."

"That's not right," said Gordon, "I may be young but even I know that trolls are supposed to ask the riddles and eat the people who can't answer."

"O.K. so ask me a riddle," repeated Jennifer Jane.

"H'm I see your point," said Gordon sadly.

"Now if you collect riddles and write them down, you could have them printed in book form, say ten riddles to a page and sell them to other trolls. I expect you know the sort of thing, buy sheet one and get sheet two free, then buy one a month until you get the complete set.

You could use the money to buy food instead of eating people all the time and make this place a little less draughty and a bit more cheerful to sit in."

"Sounds good to me," said Gordon, "I'll start first thing in the morning."

"You can start now," said Jennifer Jane, "here's a pencil, some paper and your first riddle which will get me over the bridge. Just a moment while I go up and then you can have a practice."

Jennifer Jane stood on the bridge for a moment waiting. Nothing happened.

"I'm ready," she called at last.

"Oh good, this is Gordon what's the riddle?"

"No, do it properly, you know, 'Stop who dares pass’ and all that."

"I see, right, here goes. Stop, who dares pass the bridge of insert name of resident troll Gord..."

"I don't think you've really got the hang of this" interrupted Jennifer Jane. "How about, 'If you want to pass over my bridge tell me a riddle?"

"That sounds easier. Stop there and tell me a riddle if you want to pass over my bridge. There I've done it."

Jennifer Jane gave up.

"Here's the riddle," she called, "are you ready?"

"Yes"

"What do you call an eighteen stone gorilla with a large club?"

"Er... has 'what' got an 'h' in it, or is it spelled W.O.T.?"

"Just remember it and write it down later," said Jennifer Jane rather crossly "and the answer is 'Sir'"

As she walked over the bridge she could hear Gordon talking to himself.

"What's the point of calling a gorilla 'Sir', he'd never understand because gorillas can't talk, it sounds silly to me."

Jennifer Jane started to walk back home, it sounded as if there would never be a problem with Gordon because he was so stupid. She went back through the Gate to the Witches' Home.

"George has got a new sword and will soon be off to kill the wicked witch," she said to the witch on duty in the guardhouse.

"Oh that'll be good, once she's dead we can lift the spell on Abigail without further ado. Paragraph seven clause four" she smiled, as Jennifer Jane looked rather puzzled.
A week or so later there was a tap on the window as Jennifer Jane and her parents were eating dinner. It was Abigail and Dave went to let her in.

"That reminds me," he said, "did you ever sort out the 'Rules of Engagement' problem for Jennifer Jane?"

"It seems she managed to sort it all out very well by herself and she's learned clause four into the bargain. However, a lot has happened since then."

Then, in her own words, Abigail told them this story.