I Like to Look

I like to look. I like to look at people, especially their faces.
Can I learn anything about a person just by looking at their face? I
don't know. I still like to look though, I'd be lying if I said I
didn't want to know what's going on behind those faces I see. Or would
I? Would I really be that interested if I actually found out what
thoughts existed in these people's heads. Thinking again, maybe I
wouldn't like to know. Maybe it's the mystery that I enjoy, the mystery
that every pair of eyes holds for me. Do these passers-by see me
glancing at them as I walk by? Some do I'm sure. Are they stealing a
glance at me as I pass them, do they also like to look, are they as
inquisitive regarding my state of mind as I am of theirs? Aaah, I don't
know.
I believe that we absorb everything that occurs around us through our
eyes. Yes, I know, not a very radical statement. Everything that enters
our psyche is via our eyes. These "gateways" do not always open in both
directions however. As I walk along the street, I observe many people
possessing stony, unresponsive glares. I stare directly into the eyes
of an oncoming pedestrian, the only acknowledgement I get in return is
a hand to shove me out of the way. Why can I not get any feedback from
these people? Why can I not get a simple nod of the head, just
something to show that I do actually exist!!! I ask myself, what has
lead to the wearing of all these steely glares in the first place? Has
the world become a place where to simply wear an individual expression
is to betray a sign of weakness? As I walk on I am glad to see that
this is not entirely true, however. Not every person believes in the
need to be "in the zone" all day, every day.
I like to look, and I especially like to look at faces that I receive
feedback from. Sometimes I see eyes coming towards me and they hold
emotion. I see eyes that hold joy. Joy beheld in the eyes of a young
couple. Two faces lit up with the happiness and joy of love. Two pairs
of eyes noticing nothing but each other. I see other forms of joy also.
The eyes of a father and his young child, eyes that previously may have
been hard now softened by parenthood. Eyes that may have previously
been hard or cold due to the fact that in today's world that is how
strength is perceived. His eyes have been softened by the realisation
that now the only person he must appear strong before is his child. A
child that can only draw strength from love, love that emanates from
soft, not harsh, eyes.
I am greeted by smiles as I continue along my way. I cannot help but
wonder at what prompts these smiles, however. Was that lady smiling
with me, or at me? As a result of so many unreturned looks, when one
finally is reciprocated I become rather suspicious. Was she laughing at
me, at how I look? Is my hair messed? Is my zipper open? Have I grown
an extra head???? Come on man, isn't this what you wanted? Someone to
respond? If I hadn't been so caught up thinking about her possible
motivations for smiling at me I could actually have spoken to her. Come
to think of it she was quite attractive. Aaahh well, too late now. I
must walk on. I'm sure someone else will look at me again soon.
Famous last words!!! Why do so many people choose to look downwards?
Is it easier to look down than to look in any other direction? Is it
easier to slouch both shoulders and droop a head than to stand up
straight and tall? I don't know. Does the world now weigh so much that
nobody is prepared to cast his or her eyes upwards anymore? I have seen
people look to their left, their right or downward but I have seen very
few make the effort to look up. To look down requires no effort. It is
"safe". To look down is to ignore. It is to ignore what is going on
around oneself. It is to bury one's head in the sand and carry on
regardless. It is the refuge of the broken, the unimaginative and the
uninspired. To look laterally is marginally more encouraging. To look
laterally is to at least acknowledge one's surroundings. It is to
participate to some degree in the events that are occurring around
oneself.
But to look up. To gaze upwards is the action of a truly noteworthy
being. To look up is to shake off the shackles that the everyday, the
mundane, imprison us with. Looking downwards, one cannot see but a few
feet. The ground hems one in. Even looking sideways one will eventually
encounter an obstacle, even the horizon must end somewhere. But to look
up. To look up is to aspire to something, to have a dream. It is to
leave behind the safe and the secure. To look up is to choose the more
difficult option, to take the road less travelled. But why do so few
choose to look up? Because it is so much easier not to, yes, a
depressing thought I know. Ah well, time to stroll on home. Another
day's hard staring completed. What the hell????!!!! What do you want???
No I don't want to buy your magazine, WHAT DO I CARE IF YOUR FAMILY IS
TRAPPED IN EASTERN EUROPE, AND WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO ABOUT IT
ANYWAY???? GODDAMMITT!!!!!! I'm going home to watch Super Sunday. I
don't need to listen to his problems, too much reality - I only like to
look.