People Who

Poem of the week

By HaiAnh

Tue, 22 Jul 2008
  • 2649 reads
10 comments
 

People who wave on trains
are the ones who leave their front door swung wide open
with the sun sawing them in half like a magician’s finale
and they are the ones who picked up that scarf
and put it on the fence post;

and you are the one who
after three days of walking past it, thinks:
I’ll have that.
And bolt your bedroom door
And stand there, a moment, considering
Whether to wave back.

Certificate U
Poem
Outward Travel Cannot be in the Past
Autobiography

Comments

Submitted by onemorething on
Very neat, very good, I liked the contrast.

 

Submitted by HaiAnh on
Thank you Doeslittle. x

Submitted by capoeiragem on
Nice contrast, as Doeslittle says. Loved the image of the open door, 'the sun sawing it in half like a magician's finale'...Brilliant.

Submitted by anipani on
says alot in a very few, well chosen , beatifully crafted images. I bow to you. Loud applause.

anipani

Submitted by HaiAnh on
thank you very much for your feedback and compliments anipani and capoeiragem. x

Submitted by Dynamaso on
I have to agree with the other commentors here. Well crafted, succinct and thoroughly enjoyable.

 

Submitted by MistakenMagic on
'the sun sawing them in half like a magician’s finale' - This is such a beautiful image! I loved the way you had two separate stanzas to show the contrast and the open and bolted door imagery was superbly crafted!

 

Submitted by mori saltson on
This is a really beautiful, concentrated poem, with the trademark HaiAnh sense of unease, or is that just me?! A really minimal poem, but one that says so much.

Submitted by jennifer on
This unsettled me. Very clever piece. I am the kind of person who smiles at and waves at and talks to strangers... have never pinched a scarf though...

 

Submitted by span on
I love this