Artificial Insemination

Artificial insemination - now that's a funny thing.
Old ladies, their doctors decide to ring.
To the surgery they go with their barren tums.
Crying and appealing to become a mum.
Single and sixty, postmenopausal at that,
now decides the times right to try and get fat.
Silly old lady, go home to your bed.
When your child is ten you may surely be dead.
Her friends she says, no longer roam.
So if she dies, the child would go to a good home.
I often wonder how she would have coped
with the crying and sleepless nights.
The terrible twos to the teenage tantrums,
which often end in a fight.
Getting on for eighty, the child decides to wed.
Too late for the mother.
She's just died in her bed!

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