What Alice Sees: Chapter 1

First Contact
July 15th 1991

 

Alice stuck her left thumb in her mouth and tightened her grip on Bubbles. The bell in the middle of the teddy bear jingled softly as she rolled over towards the wall and kicked at the muddle of blankets around her feet. She smiled; her eyes still screwed shut, and planted a small kiss on the bear’s head. On the other side of the room, David snorted and banged an arm against the bars of his cot. Alice rolled again, this time so she could open an eye and see her brother.

The glow from the bumblebee nightlight took the edge off the darkness and Alice could see her brother; he had poked one of his hands through the bars where it remained in a tight fist. David relaxed his fingers for a moment then he grabbed at the air. Maybe he was dreaming about tugging on Mummy’s hair.

His eyes were closed, the lashes long and dark. One of the cot’s white bars hid his forehead, but not the tufts of black hair, already grown long and thick.

David tensed, threw his arms up and snorted in a gulp of air. Then he lay still. Alice’s thumb fell from her mouth. She brushed long strands of hair from her eyes, and waited for his chest to move. She counted in her head, copying her father. Last week, when the sky lit up with lightning, they’d stood giggling by the window in the living room, waiting for the bursts of thunder. He’d said he loved the way she smiled and screamed at the same time.

Alice counted to ten before David shook into life again. He sucked in an enormous lungful of air before falling still again. Her fingers helping her to keep the tally, she whispered, “Fifteen one-thousand,” when her brother inhaled lightly. She was so intent on waiting for his chest to rise, that she didn’t notice the man in the room until he was beside the cot.

Letting Bubbles go for a moment, Alice rubbed at her eyes, and looked again. Still there, he pulled his hand from his trouser pocket and ran his fingers through his hair, smoothing loose strands behind his ear. He was as tall as her father, but thinner, and dressed in a collarless black suit like the one Granddad wore in the black and white photo in the hall.

Alice closed her eyes for five seconds. She counted in her head, the numbers hard to keep in order, her eyelids heavy to open. She thought he might fade, change into butterflies and flutter out into the night. Or simply disappear into the shadows - a dream that forgot she was awake.

But the stranger remained in her bedroom. He leaned over the rails and placed a hand on David’s head. She heard the man mutter something before standing back up. He waved his hands over the baby, like her mother did over the jasmine plant at the kitchen window. Encouraging the sweet aroma, that’s what Mummy said. David released a long breath. Ten Alice-counts, and still the sigh escaped him. A pale fog came out with the last of his exhalation, an odd grey-coloured mist filled with tiny glittering points of light. Alice rubbed at her eyes. When she opened them the man was gathering the fog in his hands. It twinkled, winked at her, like the stars in the night sky. Then the lights were gone. He gripped the top bar; hard, so the knuckles on the hand she could see went white with the pressure. Then he leaned over, releasing his grip to stroke her brother’s hair. Still peering down at David, the man took a step backwards.

Alice sat up in bed to face him properly, Bubbles in her lap, and said, “What have you done to David?” Alice folded her arms across her chest, and tried her best to glare at him.

The stranger turned slowly. The bumblebee nightlight glowed behind him, shadows mixing with the pale yellow light to pick out high cheekbones, the tip of his nose. Although his eyes remained in deep shadow, she knew they were fixed on her own.

“You can see me, child?” He took a step in her direction.

“Yes.” Alice squeezed Bubbles in her arms and pushed herself back until she bumped against the wall.

“How?”

“You’re in my bedroom, silly.”

The man tilted his head. At the same time, a breeze swept in through the open window, ruffling his hair.

“Why are you in my bedroom?” Alice tightened her grip on Bubbles, worrying the bell inside his tummy with her fingers.

“I’m not here.” He took a step towards the window. Alice thought his face looked the same colour as the moon, and very far away.

“You’re right there,” she said, frowning. “What did you do to David?”

He paused before he answered, peering back at the cot. “What I had to.”

The man moved towards the window, and as Alice blinked, he disappeared.

Alice turned back to David. He lay still in his cot. She waited for him to move. When she reached twenty, she began to cry. After a second count of twenty she opened her mouth and screamed.

“Alice!” Her mother called up from the living room, followed almost immediately by the sound of feet pounding up the stairs. The bedroom door was thrown open and Mummy ran in. She tugged at her dressing gown, pulling the chord tight as she looked quickly around the room. Her ginger hair was pulled into a ponytail, her face clean of make-up, making Alice’s mother appear young.

“What’s wrong, baby?” Mummy asked.

Alice tried to speak as her mother knelt by the bed and cuddled her, but she was hiccupping and the tears kept coming, and she couldn’t stop. David was so still. His little chest, hidden under the bunny rabbit pyjama suit, hadn’t moved since the man came. The first realisations that something was wrong, the feeling that made her scream, and now made her sobs hitch in her chest, didn’t stop her from raising a hand and pointing to her brother.

“A spider? Is there a spider in here?” Mummy searched the walls where they joined with the ceiling. Alice shook her head and pointed again. Alice watched her mother tense then remain motionless except for a gentle pulsing at the side of her neck. For a moment, Alice held her breath along with her mother; maybe whatever happened to David had happened to Mummy as well. Alice crept back on the mattress, away from the warmth of her mother’s cuddle, so the wall cooled her skin through her pyjamas. Mummy jumped up and dashed over to David’s cot. She grabbed the baby and held him into the light coming from the hall.

“Shaun, get up here!” she shrieked in a way Alice had never heard before, her mother’s voice high pitched and so loud it hurt her ears.

Daddy’s voice called up from below, “What?” Then he sprinted up the stairs and charged into her bedroom. “Teri, what’s wrong?”

“The light!” Mummy shrieked. She’d already laid David on the floor beside Alice’s bed and was pushing on his chest with two fingers.

The bulb flicked on with a faint tinkle, casting a harsh yellow light on Mummy and David. Her brother was a funny colour – his lips blue like the long ice pops her mother sometimes took out of the freezer.

“Dear Lord,” Daddy whispered.

“Call for an ambulance.” Mummy leaned over the baby and put her mouth over his mouth and nose. His chest rose, and then fell again. She pushed a few times on his little chest then bent over his face again, her ponytail flopping to the side.

Daddy turned and bolted from the room. There was a crash and some bumping sounds as he fell down the stairs, followed by a muffled shout.

Mummy made a fist leaving two fingers stretched out and pressed on David’s middle. After a moment’s pause, she took a deep breath and leaned over again, her mouth wide as she reached his face. Alice thought her mother might be sucking on him, but she wasn’t sure. Bubbles jingled as she pushed herself farther down the bed. She inched back, trying to get at an angle so she couldn’t see her brother. Pictures of little pink ballerinas danced across Alice’s bedroom wall; she traced the path they took with one finger.  

“There’s an ambulance coming. Thank God you know what to do.” Her father was back, filling the door frame. Normally his skin was the colour of tea with milk, now he’d gone pale, almost matching Alice’s in-between colour. He took a step into the bedroom, his eyes on the baby. Then he took a step back and out of view. The doorbell rang and he left.

“Alice!” Their neighbour, Lizzy, bustled into the room, and up to Alice’s bed. She brought the smell of incense and cigarettes with her, arriving breathless and blocking the view of Mummy on the floor. “You okay, poppet?” She glanced behind, stuck for three Alice-counts as she stared at the scene on the floor. She turned back, paler. “Would you like to sleep the rest of the night in my house? You could share with Jessie, sleep on her trundle bed.”

Alice shook her head, but reached out, Bubbles’ arm clasped in one fist.

“You’re a big girl now. My goodness, won’t be long before I can’t pick you up any more.”

“I’m four,” Alice said, and tried to see around Lizzy.

“Goodness, are you really?”

Lizzy grasped Alice under the arms and pulled her up. The scent of tobacco reeked close up, stale and foul on Lizzy’s breath. Alice wrinkled her nose and looked back at David as she was carried out. David was a bit pinker now, but his chest only rose when Mummy put her mouth on his. He was so little. So still. His hands lay loose by his sides, no longer grasping as her mother pushed at his chest and her father fidgeted by the door.

“What is Mummy doing to David?”

Lizzy took a deep breath, and started down the stairs. When she spoke, her voice sounded higher than normal, and in a harsh whisper she said, “She’s helping him breathe.”

“Can’t he breathe by himself?” Alice asked.

“He’s… forgotten.” Lizzy opened the front door and stepped out into the tiny front garden.

Alice watched as Lizzy wiped her eyes and gulped in the cold night air, her chest rising and falling, rising and falling. David had been still, lying on the carpet in her room. The gravel crunched under Lizzy’s sandals. Alice listened to the rhythmic steps, looking away from the front door only when Lizzy stopped to pull at something. Her long purple skirt had caught in the curling flower design on the metal gate. The fabric came free with a slight ripping sound. Lizzy sighed and produced a tissue from her sleeve, patting her eyes before closing the gate and walking along the pavement. Lizzy lived two doors down at number seven. Alice watched as Lizzy pushed the other gate. The metalwork slammed closed behind them as her mother’s best friend continued up the garden path.

As Lizzie reached for the door, Alice whispered, “The man came and took David’s breath.”

Lizzy stopped, the key in her hand almost inserted in the lock.

“What man?”

“The man that came to take David’s breath.” Alice waved her hands in front of Lizzy’s face. “He did this and took his breath. I watched him.”

“People can’t do that.” She slid the key in, and turned. “Geoff, I’m home,” she called, and shut the door behind her. “Let’s put you to bed.”

“Okey dokey.”

Lizzy took Alice up to Jessie’s room. Alice liked it, because there were posters of the Bratz on the walls, and mostly everything was pink. Lizzy pulled a low bed out from under Jessie’s and put a pillow and duvet on top. Alice climbed under the covers and curled up, hugging Bubbles to her chest.

“You going to be okay? You need me to stay?” Lizzy asked as she leaned over for a cuddle. The man had leaned over David, just like that. Alice held her breath until the grip loosened.

“Sleep tight.” Lizzy swept out of the room, taking the scent of tobacco with her.

Alice stared into the dark for a long time, Bubbles jingling sometimes as she rolled around, looking about the room. Jessie lay to the left, just above her, breathing steadily. Alice counted, to make sure her breath wouldn’t stop like David’s.

Eventually, Alice’s eyelids drooped, and sleep came.