The Gnomes of ABC

 

It's long been a total mystery to me

that when posting an oeuvre on ABC

you attract enthusiasts from across the land

in search of the exciting, the fizzy or the grand

 

They scan their screens in readiness to address

the latest offerings hot from the press

stories and poems newly concocted by writers

who, like hungry prize fighters, just yearn to finesse

 

But as one work arrives another slips away

falling from view in descending order

slowly but surely crossing the border

until coming to rest in some distant dossier

 

But hey, the readership numbers continue to accrue

like rhubarb or mushrooms bathed by the dark

they slowly but surely put on weight and spark

into life, deep in the bowels of writers' HQ

 

You had sixty two reads when you switched off the light

and sixteen more if you'd checked in the night

but the following morning there were a hundred and two

and you were completely baffled as to when, how and who

 

The secret lies in underground rooms, catacombs

where tiny beings with immaculate taste read every work,

absorbing the content of every piece at insatiable pace

millions of words hour by hour, deep underground beneath ABC tower

 

Here, secret and unseen, gnomes work through the night

hundreds of them scanning every single word

manning the barricades against neglect or slight

ensuring hope for the treasures interred

 

By morning your writing will have grown in esteem

the number of readers expanded unseen

and if your words delighted the gnomes

they'll be rewarded with fruit from the catacombs

 

So the moral of this story is pick up your pen,

put word to paper and when you've finished

post it on here for all to read, especially the gnomes

with insatiable need and a slavish devotion beyond our ken

https://image2url.com/r2/default/audio/1769508610160-ffd10c4d-727a-4766-...

Audio track of the author reading the poem