First Time Fathers

 First Time Fathers  

By Paul McCann

Before men were fathers, they were unaware of many things about themselves that would soon present when they would have a child of their own .

Every man who became a father for the first time may have a different story to tell about the experience however this is my experience of becoming a first-time father and if yours was different I hope that you’re not offended or feel threatened by what I’m sharing about the experience . Further to what I’m sharing if you had a father who was abusive or uncaring , I need you to understand that all fathers are not bad people and it’s not my intention to bring to the surface bad memories that you experienced from your childhood ,

Each first-time father has no idea about becoming a parent until it happens . When you are connected to the miracle of life as a first-time father , you quickly adapt to what it’s all about . There is no handbook guide to help you with the frequent calling that demands sacrifice and paternal love you need to provide .

Until you have a child of your own you will never know the honour that had been given top you and how blessed you are to have been given a child to care for ,

That innocent child who depends on you for everything every day , to be happy and to stay alive and feel loved , this answer to that call comes naturally to first time fathers . An instant reaction to a crying child with an immediate response to comfort that baby , then there is a wanting to provide a comfortable and happy place for the baby to grow and when that happens most first-time fathers start to click in to what the role is all about . Most men who have become fathers for the first time are surprised beyond belief at  the role that has been given to them and with that thought in mind being a Dad for the first time is the greatest gift God has given you because as a Father you will be able to see the love a father must have for his child .

Being a father, you will be called to play other roles such as a teacher, a doctor and also a cook and cleaner , a carer or nurse , a storyteller and a comedian ,a maker of happy memories and as life goes on there will be many other roles a father is called upon to play ,

When the first child begins to grow and another child is born, you’re no longer a first-time father because now you’re experienced and know what to expect however this sharing is all about being a first-time father not experienced fathers .

When you have to leave for work there is a separation that is difficult because while you’re at work all you can do is think about that child and all you see before you is the face of the innocent child looking into the depths of your soul .

You can’t wait to finish work and get home to see that child because every first-time father has a connection , a soul tie and a blood tie to that child .

Each day a father looks at his child , he realises just too much his life has changed and yes, it’s true , it’s not just a dream , it’s a reality of having your very first child and to see that baby there right in front of you , staring into your hearts space you feel the love reach out from the universe and take control of your thoughts and emotions every second of the day . Then when you hear that baby calling your name .

“ Daddy : for the first time you feel  for the very time that special thing in your heart because now your new name is Daddy and you have a flesh and blood child of your very own . Another thing happen at this point because your loving wife has become a Mammy and you both have started a family so with all the changes life had presented it will never be the same again because as a first time father you now have a first time mammy who is your wife and you’re both learning together as a couple to do new things together like changing nappies and bathing the baby , feeding and nursing , These skills come naturally as your relationship matures with your wife because you are now also comforting and caring for both you’re her and  the new baby . The things you used to do with your wife have changed because as a first-time father, you’re learning to be a mind reader as well as a more sensitive person who knows what to say at the right moment and howe to open doors , have the breakfast ready on time . Another skill first time fathers acquire is how to bring up the babies wind after feeding time and how to hang up the babies clothes on the washing line . It's a joy to be in such constant need for a first-time father , there is a new bond that develops between first time fathers and the bottle-fed baby .

This happens in a natural way with more and more two hourly feeds and the regular routine of feeding , cleaning and putting the baby back to sleep before you get ready to go to work for the day .

Day by day  first time fathers become proud of their new role in life and with that they know that God has blessed them to play the role and the wanting to do that more every day is a hunger that only regular hugs can satisfy .

The gleam in your babies eye , the cute look of the child face , the expression of need in every cry , then you know you have suddenly become a nurse because you’re special maternal gifts have been kick started through the intervention of an innocent child .

As the baby was your first since the very first day , nothing can take aways a fathers love , no one can break that bond as father has with his child .A soul tie and a blood tie is  a God given contract that had been given to you so only God has the ability to end that contract . 

.Every you know and everything you feel as a first time father is love and it grows stronger and it’s hard to let it go because as far as love goes, the4re’s aways a  thumbs up or a wink or a grin that is passed on in the busy times like when you have to leave for work every day and the awesome thing about that is you’re still learning as a first time father but you’re learning fast how to be a better kind of man and a kinder and more understanding person  . Then you discover a special thing as a first-time father called trust which is that unseen seed that you need to have planted in your mind that will flourish as the years go on . The trust a first-time father has that grows into a tree . The tree that grows is the tree of man who has understood what it was like to be a first-time father and that’s a tree born from trust that bears fruit in the lives of all first-time fathers .

May God preserve that trust in all first time fathers to believe and never doubt that  everything you had ever hoped for will become a reality for you as long as you can put your trust in a loving father without any doubt will never abandon you and will always be there for you in every need and as you closer to your loving Father you will see a pillar of strength that has kept you safe in everything you did aa a first time father and your reward will be great as long as you trust and keep believing .

The End