Real or Fake

How do you know whats real and whats fake
I wish I could know cause my heart is gonna break.
Im sure this happens all the time
So I'll take a breath and I'll be just fine.
But in my head im freaking out
All I wanna do is scream and shout.
You only see me as something to screw
But what it does to me, if only you knew.
I sit alone unable to sleep
Thinking of you and counting sheep.
You have no clue that my feelings are real
And you act like nothing happens, its no big deal.
You dont want anyone to know of the plans we make
So I have to hide my feelings and make them fake.
I have to act like I dont like you at all
But when your in front of me to my knees I fall.
So when I hear your name I only frown
Its like my heart is ripped out and thrown on the ground.
So my question stands, is it real or fake
Am I sleeping or am I awake?