Alfredos: After Michael Donaghy’s ‘Shibboleth’

Gold cherry

By ralph

Sun, 01 Jun 2025
  • 718 reads
4 comments
 

Alfredos

After Michael Donaghy’s ‘Shibboleth’ 

 

Vacationers at Tahoe windows.

The morning sky painted by seven 

year old boys wild on their birthdays. 

All sugar, soap and sequences.

The promises of the water hours.

 

Out on the bay, a fishing boat

with two men. Humming catholic 

prayers before the bullet cracks

the air and a priest bows his head. 

Poor and weak. A Judus Alfredo. 

 

“You’re my older brother and I love you, 

but don’t ever take sides with anyone

against the family again, ever.”

The American dream oars for tomorrow

where loyalty sleeps with the fishes.

 

 

 

 

Certificate PG
Poem

Comments

Submitted by Ewan on

  This very interesting poem is our Social Media pick of the day.
Please share where you can ...

Check out Donaghy's poem which inspired it, too.

Author Page at the 'Zon
 

Submitted by ralph on

Thank you.

Here is the definition of 'Shibboleth'.

A "shibboleth" can refer to a few things: a word, phrase, or custom used as a test to distinguish between members of a group and non-members; a slogan or catchphrase; or a belief, principle, or practice that is commonly adhered to but is considered outdated or inappropriate.

The poem is about the secret boyhood to adult code of crime. I used images from the film 'The Godfather'. The weak Alfredo who betrayed the family and the death of Luca Brasi.

Micheal Donaghy's 'Shibboleth' is a classic and should be read. I was lucky to have him as my poetry teacher at Birkbeck College years ago.

 

 

 

 

 

Submitted by ralph on

Final edit. A poems journey. In the end I wanted to honour the codes in Donaghy’s astonishing poem and Coppola’s film, but also wanted to say something about the current ruination of America. I used to love visiting but don’t think I will ever again.

 

Submitted by Jessiibear on

Those vacationers at Tahoe windows and the morning sky “painted by seven” stayed with me - so deceptively gentle before the undertow pulls us deeper. And that image of two men humming Catholic prayers before the crack… haunting, chilling in the best way.

You’ve woven boyhood, betrayal, and cinema into something rich and elegiac. A fitting homage - and a quiet lament: 

Really love how the subtext bleeds through - there’s this quiet ache running underneath the surface that says more than what’s directly spoken. Which of course a peak in poetry, and expertly done here. The imagery is rich on its own, but it’s that undercurrent of betrayal and disillusionment (with the dream, with America) that lands and stays there... It doesn’t preach, just… mourns, gently.

Powerful stuff. You have quite the talent. Beautifully done. 

Jessheart