Morning mist lifts

Cherry

By Rhiannonw

Thu, 11 Jan 2018
  • 2699 reads
9 comments
 

Walking, driving through the misty village,
murky, mysterious, vague, milky trees.

over the hill
Wraiths of mist rising amongst the black gaunt trees,
blue sky appearing above, bright, hopeful,
crescent moon at centre of the dome ,
wisps of cloud.

Later
Sunshine sparkles the bright brown trees
flooding the world from the clear heavens.

 

Certificate U
Poem
Nature
Nature

Comments

Submitted by Di_Hard on

the way you have made the first part like small steps, words broken by commas, and end with the release of a flowing sentence is wonderful. I love the last two lines

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Thank you. I'm pleased you enjoyed it an for your analysis. I was especially impressed the other morning at the scene described in the middle stanza, but hadn't my camera with me, or the ability to stop and take a photo, so it was good to try to convey it with words! Rhiannon

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Thank you for the cherries for this! Rhiannon

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on

I was so impressed by that second stanza Rhiannon, it sums up so much of your visual impression. The image of Wraiths of mist rising amongst the black gaunt trees was beautifully haunting.

Very much enjoyed.

Jenny.

 

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Thank you Jenny, I'm glad I managed to 'draw the picture' for you! Rhiannon

 

Submitted by Jane Hyphen on

This is very atospheric, I love the way you've broken it up with the cues from your journey. Lucky to be passing through villages where nature still has such presence. In the towns nature is pushed away and you have to search for it or actively host it.

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Thank you, Jane. Yes, we are privileged to be living more rurally now, though in a small town ourselves. The top picture wasn't taken that morning in the village, but it was a very similar feel, though a bit more built up. 'Over the hilll' was in the open country. Rhiannon

 

Submitted by Denzella on

Hello dear Rhiannonw,

This poem is beautiful.  I see you haven't lost your touch though it look s like I have.  Where did these italics come from?

Moya x

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Thank you, Moya. Lovely to hear from you!

Wasn't sure what you meant about the italics – I just clicked on the 'I' in the bar about where I was typing to get those words italic, and then clicked on it again so the next ones weren't italic. warm regards, Rhiannon