Promises Beyond The Veil Of Light ( PT 41 )

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Part Forty One

 

 

THERE ARE NOW GOING TO BE MORE THAN 48 PARTS, DUE TO THE FACT I'VE HAD TO SPLIT PARTS UP AND ALSO WITH THE EDITING I'VE ADDED A LOT MORE ON TO THE STORY.

 

 

 

 

After leaving Hirwin Ravenclaw's, Evie had been beside herself with anger and frustration, she felt like the past three years had been a complete waste of time...sham! Was the word that sprung to mind. “Who the hell was this man Hirwin anyway?” She uttered in an enraged tone, gazing around to make sure nobody was listening.

 

Evie knew she was no spring chicken and maybe over weight, but it seemed that since asking Hirwin to stay the night, he'd declined to speak another word to her until now.

 

She'd always considered herself curvaceous if slightly plump, but thought that since her husband liked her that way, it wouldn't be a problem, after all! She thought, it's what's on the inside that counts.

 

Marching off down the road clutching her bag to her chest, Evie was aware of people staring, she needed to get away, not wanting to go home to an empty house and was too proud to visit friends, but needed to talk to someone.

 

So many thoughts ran through her mind. All over Christmas she'd wanted Hirwin to call, but he never did phone. It was only when she went around to her friend's house on Christmas day, that she'd discovered his address. Determined to get to the bottom of why he'd been avoiding her and discovering he couldn't care less, she now felt like a broken woman after finding out the truth.

 

There was only one place where she'd find some sort of solace. Picking up pace as rain continued to fall heavily, the bus arrived almost as soon as she got to the stop. Evie thought this was one sure sign she was heading in the right direction.

 

She never noticed anyone on the bus, lost in her own thoughts gazing out the window at nothing in particular gave her distance from these strangers going about their own business. All Evie thought about was her late husband as she arrived at the cemetery gates.

 

There wasn't a soul around on this cold late afternoon. The rain had been pouring but now had turned to sleet. Evie shivered as she entered through the gates, walking the path that led to his grave.

 

The curved archway of the entrance to the church would have seemed an inviting place to sleep off her tears, out of the freezing weather where maybe the vicar might see her and some form of compassion might be found, but Evie wasn't looking for sympathy, she was angry, not only at herself for being drawn into a relationship that didn't really exist, but also at Hirwin Ravenclaw, he'd made a fool out of her, all these years she'd been foolish enough to let him lead her on, just to be dumped like a worn out piece of furniture that was no longer needed, it all kept playing over and over in her head driving Evie over the edge.

 

She felt like he'd put some kind of spell on her, where she'd needed him so badly it hurt. She lay across her late husband's grave, talking to the stone that read: In loving memory of Gerry Warren. Not only a caring father to son David, but the best husband too. 1949 to 1986.

 

“Oh Gerry, what have I done to get so hurt? Have I been bad? Is there a curse on me? I tried ringing David, but he never answers the phone.”

More tears began falling from her sore red eyes as she took a hankie from her bag to wipe them away. “Darling Gerry I've lost all hope. Here I was once a strong woman with so much to offer, now I don't know what's going on, my heads all over the place, with so much sadness. How can I go on living in a world that doesn't care for the good people, and lets those who are bad have such power.”

 

She thought of Mina and began sobbing again, body shaking with emotion, words slurring, mixing with tears that fell onto the grave. Evie scratched at the surface of stone, it was as if she hoped by doing this Gerry would come to her aid. “I'm supposed to be helping Mina, but...but now it's impossible.” She stuttered words. “I don't want to pu...put her in a foster home, bu...but that bloody Hirwin has given me no choice. There's no way I can carry on taking care of her.”

 

Evie gazed up at the sky unable to see much at all, then back down. “You see my darling, she's only thirteen and needs someone strong to guide her.” Evie paused before continuing. “Trouble is, I've lost all my strength, it's as if every bit has been squeezed out like a sponge.”

 

As if waiting for a reply, she stopped talking, but none came. This was the lowest she'd ever felt in her life. The snow began to fall harder, Evie was soaked to the skin, but felt she needed to carry on being punished. “I really want to be with you darling, to feel your touch, your arms around me saying everything will be okay, that you're there to give me encouragement...but now I'm alone with no one to care for me again and it frightens me.”

 

Evie curled up into a fetal position, never thinking she'd say the next few words, but they just came out on their own. “Oh, Gerry I wish I were dead.” There she'd said it and meant every word. What was the point in going on this endless treadmill of life without love? It had been hard enough when Gerry died, but this time it was different, she'd been rejected, living in hope that Hirwin would ask her to marry him, but instead he'd taken advantage of her.

 

Still thoughts just kept going over and over in her head, the repetition of years mingled with tears, till she had a lump in her throat and felt her stomach churn. It felt like a million knives slashed across her skin as bitter wind ate through her clothes causing frost bite, Evie cursed Ravenclaw. Having no idea of how long she'd been at Gerry's grave, Evie closed her eyes shutting out the world, her mind becoming numb to even thinking as flakes fell from the sky, each one feathering her body guiding Evie further and further away from reality.

 

To be continued...