"Attack" on the Spider Eggs

8/26/11
The Diary of Katharine Spiderwhick
Today was horrifying. After finally catching enough food to last my babies after they hatch, some fat chick and her bratty little son that was very chubby came over with a big shovel and tried to kill me! I mean, who does that? First they take a chance of moving my home (I guess I was ok with that, I mean it’s good to move every once in a while, right?), then scare me off with a weapon that I can’t even defend myself against and take that opportunity to squash my children! And they weren’t even alive yet! I had to stay over at my friend Theresa’s web across the street for a while before finally going back “home” and setting up a funeral. For the dozens of babies I laid. I mean, of course I’m still mad! It was almost time for them to hatch, and I had everything prepared. I said my prayers to God and had a little place tucked away for them to eat, and someone kills them! I was ready to sacrifice myself for my children! Honestly, I’m just astonished at what these humans do now. How rude. I wonder how she’d like it if I took a shovel to her son! Ugh.

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Nina was devastated when she had to kill the spider’s eggs. She couldn’t bare the thought being without her little Benji, so she didn’t even want to think what it would be like losing twenty of him. All she was trying to do was move the spider and her babies out of the way so no one steps on her. That’s all she wanted to do! But instead the mother runs away and doesn’t come back. And there would be no one to train the poor children that were about ready to hatch.

“The mommy was going to come back,” Benji told Nina.

“No, the mommy ran away,” Nina explained.

“I have a bad feeling in my tummy that she was gunna come back.” Benji insisted, “But now when she does, she’s gunna be real mad.”

“Benji,” Nina sighed, “The mommy is gone. Now let’s go inside and eat some lunch.”

“I’m going to come back out here after and see if she comes back.” The eight year old declared before heading inside to wash up.

So after Benji finished his meal, he raced outside and looked at the spot in the grass where the web was before it was destroyed. At first he didn’t see anything, so he bent down on all fours and leaned in, scrunching up his nose to get a better look. After a few seconds, he noticed the mother black widow was hard at work creating another web. The spider stopped when she saw Benji and contemplated whether she should bite him or not. She decided against it, but for laughs, Katherine the spider jumped onto his face. Benji went wide eyed and red faced, screaming at the top of his lungs for his mommy. Nina came barreling out, another shovel in her hands. When she saw Benji running around in circles, arms flailing in mid air, she ran over to see what was going on.

Her voice didn’t nearly get as loud as her son’s screams, so she looked around and saw nothing. Then she started to think that he was going mental; until she saw the big black spider right in the middle of his face. Without thinking, she ran faster and pulled back the shovel to smack his face with. Benji stopped in mid circle and ducked right before it hit his face, shovel still skimming the top of his head. Katherine (Kathy) jumped off his face before anything bad happened, scurrying through the long grass over to Theresa’s web, laughing the whole way.

“Mommy, what’s that little squeaking sound I hear coming from the grass?”

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I guess Benji was right, thought Nina, examining the bald spot on top of her son’s head.

“Is it bad, mommy?” Benji whined, “Am I bleeding?”

“No, but you have a bald spot on top of your head.” Nina exhaled a mouth full of air.

“You cut my hair?” He looked up, bewildered, “While I was sleeping?”

This got a laugh out of Nina, “No, baby, I accidentally shaved the top of your head when I went to hit that spider on your face.” She pushed him back a little and looked at his face, “No body messes with my baby.” Then Nina pulled him in for a kiss on the forehead.
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The Diary of Katherine Spiderwhick
8/27/11
That was hilarious. A very good come back for what they did. I’m still mad, and am planning something that they will never forget. If only humans wouldn’t freak out if spiders talked to them. They always do. They spend lots of money hiring a psychologist, thinking they’ve gone crazy because some spider said “hi”. It always happens. Maybe that’s why I hate humans so much… I told Theresa all about it, and she was jealous because she wasn’t there to see it. In fact, she was so jealous that she vowed to never talk to me again. Then when I said I was leaving, she started begging me not to go, and then we both burst out laughing. What a day. But this time Theresa won’t be missing out on anything, because she’s part of the plan…

So far.