Paranoia

 

Monday 5th of December 2016, 9:12 pm.

 

Dear Diary, today was just a current day, nothing much happened. Studying in the morning, working on the library with Marc on the afternoon, cleaning the house and jogging in the evening. I am dead tired right now, had almost no time to dedicate to myself. Will take a bath, eat a quick dinner and jump straight to bed. Goodnight.

 

Tuesday 6th of December 2016, 7:03 am.

 

Waking up was insanely hard today. I didn’t get much sleep last night, I kept getting this weird feeling I was being watched, but every time I checked, I would find nothing. Just my head playing games with me. Anyways, I’m eating breakfast as of now, and will probably study in the library till lunchtime. Don’t expect anything crazy to happen today, most probably going to be a day just like yesterday. I should get going.

 

Tuesday 6th of December 2016, 8:42 pm.

 

Today… even if I expected it to be a normal day, and it kind of was, something felt off. Probably me still.. well, I should just write the journal. After eating breakfast everything went as expected, I went to the library and studied until it was my shift on the counter, having lunch on the restaurant across the street before it started. Only thing that was unusual, apart from the feeling I had, was that Marc was late. We share the same shift and it’s kind of boring when he’s not here, so I decided to get ahead with my studies, it was very rare for anyone to ask for anything in the counter anyways. After a while, an hour maybe, Marc arrived, and everything went better than expected. It seems he had been caught up in traffic. After that I just went home and everything went normal. I think I arrived at 6 pm, but I can’t be sure, maybe a little later. It was at this point when I started getting that feeling. It had been ten minutes since I entered the house when I first got the impression I was being stared at, just like last night. Every time I’d look past a window, I’d see movement right outside of it from the corner of my eyes. At first I thought I was just seeing things, but the feeling just wouldn’t go, so I eventually went out to check. And nothing, everything was perfectly normal. I felt relieved for a bit, but after a little while the feeling came back, and no matter what I did, it wouldn’t leave. I tried switching rooms and checking several times, and even tried something as ridiculous as hiding, but the constant pressure on my chest wouldn’t leave me. It was suffocating. I started to lose control of my breathing and I couldn’t help but give constant looks to my surroundings. I decided to jogging a bit early, thinking it could have helped, somehow. It did. After I ran past the first square, the feeling was gone. Out of fear of getting it back once I came back home, I ran more than usual today. I’m so exhausted. And the worst part is, as I write this, the feeling is slowly coming back. Could it be because there are too many windows here? I hope I get to sleep tonight.

 

Wednesday 7th of December 2016, 6:30 am.

 

Now I’m scared. I almost got no sleep tonight. I am almost sure there was someone watching me from below the big tree in the backyard my window has sight of. It was dark, yes, but I could still figure out a human silhouette. Just staring at me, doing nothing else. I was terrified. I tried to act like I was sleeping and didn’t move much, but my breathing and heart rate were out of control, and I could feel a great pressure on my chest, heavier than before. Some tears came out of my eyes too. By the time I dared to look again, it was 6 am and the sun was slowly rising. I don’t know what I should do, this has never happened before and I never had to contact the police for anything. I guess I’ll try and get this out of my mind during the morning and follow the normal routine, and then ask Marc for advice on what to do. I hope this all ends quick, I don’t know how much of this I’ll be able to take.

 

Wednesday 7th of December 2016, 9:30 pm.

 

Well, I’m relieved now. When my shift started and I told Marc what was happening h.. I guess it would be better to re-tell the conversation:

“So.. there’s someone stalking you?” He asked, he seemed worried.

“I don’t know, I think so…” He could notice the fear in my voice.

“Alice we’re calling the police right this moment.” He sounded firm and confident, his voice reassured me greatly.

“When they answer, tell them what has been happening to you as detailed as you told me.” He got his phone out of his pocket and dialed before giving it to me.

I was nervous, it was the first time I actually had to call the police for anything. They replied.

The conversation was easier than I thought. I talked to a man and told him what I had been feeling, and he said he’d be sending a patrol to stay on the other side of the street to watch my house at 5 pm, and it would be there the whole day until 12 pm, when it would receive a refreshment that would stay till 6 am.

I felt like a great weight was lifted of my chest. I almost cried right there on the spot. I thanked Marc and finished my shift, by the time I got home, the patrol was there. I went to greet it, and a policeman came out, Steven Weaver. He was very nice to me and assured me nothing would escape his gaze.

The whole afternoon I felt nothing. I was able to do everything I had to do in complete tranquility. Now I will hopefully rest just as peacefully and everything will be over.

 

Thursday 8 of December 2016, 6:02 am.

 

This is wrong. It’s all wrong. Even though the fucking police patrol was sitting in front of my house, I still saw the silhouette on below the tree on front of my bloody window, and I just had to pretend to be asleep while secretly crying and shaking. That tree is on the backyard, no one should be able to get to the backyard without being seen from the front of the house, even less getting out afterwards. And this time it was worse. I actually heard someone walking around the house. I could more than clearly hear the steps. I was trying to make as less noise as possible but I still couldn’t help but cry.  After I woke up and went to check if there was anything out there, I went to talk to the policeman, it was the refreshment this time, John Pierce, he was also nice and tried to comfort me, he said he really didn’t see anything even though he was looking the whole time. This is not right, not at all. I’m crying now and I don’t know what to do anymore. I need to talk to someone. I will call Marc and ask him to meet me. Right now.

 

Thursday 8 of December 2016, 1 pm.

 

I talked to Marc. He was kind enough to meet me at the restaurant in front of the library, while we drank coffee. I told him everything that happened, and he.. I don’t know. It’s better if I just say it.

“So, you’re telling me that, even though the police had been watching over your house… you still saw the silhouette on your backyard, and even heard noises inside the house?”

It seems he didn’t believe me, and I understood that reaction. I probably wouldn’t believe it myself, but it was true, I had seen the silhouette and I could hear the steps without a single doubt, they were as clear as daylight. I was desperate.

“You’ve been under a lot of stress lately, studying and losing sleep is also not good for you. Maybe you’re just seeing things?”

I felt insulted. But what he said was believable, I had little to no time to spend on myself these days, I was indeed stressed.

“Here, go to this doctor. Today. Tell him that you know me, he’ll have you as soon as possible.”

I trust Marc, he’s probably the closest person to me right now. I know he just wants the best for me.. I decided I’d give it a try. Doctor Roger Paz, decided he’d have me tomorrow in the evening.  I hope nothing goes wrong.

 

Friday 9 of December 2016, approximately 1 am.

 

It’s too much now. I can’t take it. I saw it. It was there. I had the feeling of being watched the whole afternoon. I tried to ignore it as best I could, but when I was about to go to bed, I decided take a peek outside the window and it was there. IT WAS RIGHT THERE BELOW THE FUCKING TREE. I decided to tell the officer across the street, but as I stepped out of my room, I heard them. Footsteps. I rushed to the bathroom as quick as I could, I already had my diary in my hand. I wish I could have grabbed my phone, but it was on the sleep table next to the bed, and if I went to get it, the person on the backyard would have seen me. Right now I’m hiding in the shower. It’s the only place I feel safe in. I can feel the footsteps wandering around. I don’t dare to take a peek. I’m crying. I’m shaking. I’m desperate.

 

Friday 9 of December 2016, 6:07 am.

 

Once I stopped hearing the footsteps and waited a while, I decided to go out. There was no one inside. Everything was in it’s place. There was no one below the tree. The police didn’t see anything at all. Am I really going crazy? I’m so desperate I started pulling my hair and screaming as I cried. I need to go see the doctor, but first, I need to calm down. I won’t study today, I will take a long bath and get prepared for my shift. I need to take this out of my mind. At least until I talk with the doctor.

 

Friday 9 of December 2016, 9:46 pm.

 

I just got home. I told everything to Marc on my shift, but I asked him to try and take it out of my mind talking about anything else. At first it was hard, but I ended up forgetting about it for a short while. Still, the feeling of nervousness and anxiety wouldn’t leave me. After that, I finally got to see the doctor. He said I was seeing hallucinations. None of it was real. He told me to calm down, it was all in my mind. I was crying in front of him. He gave me a medication that said would make it stop. I am supposed to take pills a day, one in the morning, one before lunch and one before going to sleep, and also I have to call him daily and tell him if there’s any progress. I made time. I didn’t want to come home. I walked in the park, Marc accompanied me. It felt nice. I haven’t felt good this whole week at all. After that we went to eat to a restaurant and then he drove me home. I am about to drink the pill right now. I pray to god this works, if not, I don’t know what I do. I don’t want to think about it.

 

Saturday 10th of December 2016, 7:40 am.

 

I think it worked. I didn’t see anything nor hear anything last night. I still couldn’t sleep, I was too scared to do so, but time passed and nothing happened, and I eventually fell asleep. I still don’t feel completely safe, but it’s already progress. Maybe it was all in my mind. If I think about it carefully, it doesn’t make any sense at all. No one should be able to get in and out my house without being seen from the front, even less if it’s two persons. I’m starting to believe it was all in my mind. I told the patrol I hadn’t seen anything, but I couldn’t be sure, they’ll stay one more night. It’s a relief. I’ll try and do my usual routine today. Fingers crossed. I should go take my medicine.

 

Saturday 10th of December 2016, 9:54 pm.

 

It’s already this late and I haven’t felt anything. The whole evening went just as peaceful as before. Of course I kept having the necessity to look around me, but there was nothing. I couldn’t see anything from the corners of my eyes. I am very happy. I called the doctor and he told me I should still take the medicine, so I will take one right now and peacefully hop into bed. If something goes wrong now.. No. I won’t think about it. Right now I am happy. Please let it continue that way

 

Sunday 11th of December 2016, 7:08 am.

 

Nothing. Nothing at all. I was able to sleep peacefully. It’s working. This medicine magic is working. I am so relieved I am almost crying. It was all in my head, Marc and the Doctor were right. This time I told to the patrol that I didn’t see anything, gave my thanks, and they left. I’m so glad it’s over I can’t express it in words. Stupid head of mine messing around with me. I’ll take my medicine and have a normal, happy day. Bye.

 

Sunday 11th of December 2016, 9:29 pm.

 

This was the loveliest day I had in quite some time. I was able to study, clean the house and take the day to relax, since I didn’t have to work today. It’s over. I’m so happy it’s over. I’ll have a little celebration by myself, preparing my favorite food and staying up till late. Cheers!

 

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Diary found in the house of victim Alice Keener, found dead in her house at 2:31 pm of monday 12th of December 2016. Victim’s corpse was found heavily damaged, showing knife wounds and bruises. Clear signs of sexual abuse. Main suspects based on the evidence found at the crime scene: Marc Pledger, Roger Paz, Steven Weaver and John Pierce.