Galaxy. Part Three.

I never did find out who or what Christian Cotton was talking about on the phone for twenty minutes. But I’m sure of one thing, I bet he was in a lot of pain the days after the accident! Six days after the crash I went to bed and went to sleep only to be woken up a short time later with an awful nightmare! It was short and to the point, it was Christian’s eyes HUGE like black and white spirals. It unnerved me, for its been years since I had a nightmare. It’s true, since the accident I’d seen his eyes wide, just before the impact, goodness knows what went through his mind in that split second, I think we both must have thought the same, DEATH! I’ve relived that moment many, many times. It was one of those incidents where I wished I could have turned back time, the “If only,” Came over and over again to me. And yes, it did seem surreal.

SO many people, mainly at work said, “You need to claim for whiplash, neck, backache and the rest.” That was easier said than done, for my neck didn’t hurt! But I do know from past accidents that pains do come later on, even after a year the pain has been known to still be there, not everyday but deep pain when it comes, very intense and as a direct result of the accident, I was involved in. But my neck didn’t hurt enough for me to say, “My neck hurts.” It ached, but it didn’t hurt.

Sonja at work told me, “My friend was in an accident, it was late, dark, and raining hard, the guilty driver, the other person quickly gave his details and went, (they had swopped details). My friend then added his baby Son in the car, so he and his Wife who was there got compensation and the baby that wasn’t even in the car, all got the same amount!” WOW! That shocked me, the guilty driver wouldn’t have known if the baby was in the car or not, for he didn’t stay long enough. Another Colleague said, “Say everything hurts, it’s your time now to get big money!” It was Kym who shocked me the most, she said, “I will send you a link on your phone, so you can learn how you are to act, when you see the doctor, how to do your limited, injured movements, with pain!” The link arrived, but I didn’t open it. Kym also said to me, “My Cousin has used this accident Company many times and has had thousands given to him, here give them a call.” The Company is very famous, so I said to her, “OK, I will.”

There was genuine pain in my body, which I certainly didn’t want to be long term, my back hurt a lot, that was the main one. I rang, the Insurance Company, Kym recommended me, and they were wonderful, they asked me forty-five minutes of questions! And the woman said, “I will send you to a doctor who will examine you and paper work of this conversation, for you to sign and return to me.” 

Another Company came and took my Galaxy away. Scrapped with its lovely, leather seats forever. Two weeks later money arrived for the value of the car. But always in the back of my mind was the dreaded visit to the doctor for him to check me over, for that would determine the amount I’d get, I wasn’t looking forward to it. I wasn’t going to lie, Kym said to me, “Everyone does it, lie, exaggerate.” I had no intention of doing such things. I believe in a, “God who sees me,” Wherever I am. Genesis Chapter 16 verses 13 and 14.

My hips hurt, which scared me, I didn’t want bad hips, my elbows hurt that scared me too, immediately, after the accident my arms and legs felt like jelly, weak that was very scary. I felt venerable, strengthless, unpowerful, this was SO unlike me. Oh, why did it have to happen! Why me? Colleagues at work said, “You are SO lucky,” (Because I was going to come into all this money) I didn’t feel lucky. I didn’t want to be in this situation. I was given a date when I would be going to the doctor for him to examine me. It would be held at my own doctors but he is not a doctor who works there, he would be just using a room. Seventy percent of the people who spoke to me, said, “Lie, be over the top,” And when that didn’t have the desired affect they would add, “You have to think long term, you may not hurt now but you will later, think of then.” That was true, I knew that for a fact, and they were right with the latter info. Even the Insurance Company said in their info letter to me that I had to sign, “You have to do your part….” I knew exactly what they meant.

The dreaded day arrived. I went in to see the doctor, he asked me a few questions, “Mild, Moderate or Severe.” He asked me to do what he did, I did, and I laid on the bed he moved my legs. I said to him, when I was seated again, “When I am in the car, and I am at a junction, I have no confidence to come out from the side road, all the traffic is behind me waiting, I wait and wait, I think can I make it? Can I come out now? Is it safe?” And when the courtesy car went back, in the taxis I feel like a wreck! It feels like the drivers are speeding, they come out of side roads without a thought, twice two different taxi drivers came out and the oncoming cars almost crashed into me, the taxi drivers said, “They were indicating to turn left!” I replied, “You need to wait, to see what the driver is doing, as there is this left and that left, just further on, you don’t know which left they mean!” It was an awful, awful, awful time! I felt not in control, my Life was in their hands! But even when I was sure they were speeding as I was behind the driver, Paul who could see the fear in my eyes said, to me quietly, “He is not speeding.” That made no difference to me. I told the doctor how the taxis and driving made me feel, he made a note of it, and replied, “OK.” I left feeling I’d not let myself down and more importantly, I’d not let God down.

I had a phone call soon after from the Insurance Company, he asked me, “About the physical side,” I replied, “In general all is well, except for minor aches and pains, here and there,” He said, “I will send you an updated report from the doctor for you to read and sign.”

The report gave my replies and the doctors recommendations, including how long or short term I would be unwell for, he also said, I’d need, “Psychiatric help,” And he wrote down how many sessions I would need. There wasn’t a time since the accident that I haven’t thought when I’m driving, that a car approaching the junction on my left, isn’t going to come out and hit me, even those in the car with me, felt and thought the same! For I would say, “Did you see that car, I thought it was going to come straight out onto the main road?” Their reply was, “I thought so too.”    

I had another phone call from the Insurance Company, asking, “Do you wanted physio?” I replied, “No thank you, as my back does hurt, but I don’t want someone to touch it and make it worse.” She said, “If you change your mind just give us a call,” I replied “I will.”

When the Courtesy car was taken back, I used taxis every day, seven days a week, it was very stressful, I was unable to relax, I was not in control, I very slowly became a ‘non-driver,’ but I became what I was when I was younger, a backseat driver! I did have to explain to the taxi drivers, “I’ve been in a car accident,” And they were all wonderful.

It had to come to an end, and I needed to look for another car, I wasn’t looking forward to it.