By Tom Brown
- 339 reads
Abstaining from smoking cigarettes has a 100% mortality rate.
Winners know when to stop. Winners never quit. Quitters never win.
The gentle art of writing off motorcars–
Drink responsibly, grapple your best friend's wife responsibly,
drive responsibly crash responsibly and die responsibly.
SMOKE IT UP!
Winstin's plains “I don't give a damn I'm a wasted man.”
New Satin-Vogue Zakspeed e-ciggies “After action satisfaction.”
“The next best thing to a Lixnton, is another Lixnton.”
“Sorry about your carpet man I almost made the white steering wheel
“I'll buy you a new one.”
“Pity about the hole in your luxury duvet “I just had to have one last smoke.”
“Sorry about the TV. I was just cleaning my revolver.”
“I didn't know your bike was parked under the balcony
“I was sick last night I'm sorry dude.”
“Sorry bud' I crashed into your car I was lighting a cigarette.”
MR BROWN CHOKES ON HIS
LAST STEAK AT GREENTREES
“Couldn't chew your steak it was stupid to try and swallow the thing whole.
“Sorry about the embarrassment. Lucky I survived imagine the headlines.”
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