Not For Later

It was a Tuesday and the lazy afternoon threatened to melt everything meltable under the sun. In our humble home, a distance of about two feet separated me from my Grandfather as I watched him eat his rocky road ice cream. I smelled the faint odor of mint air freshener inside Grandfather's room. He was wearing a white cotton sando and stripe pajamas. He was seated comfortably in his steady wheelchair. There were paper towels on his lap and some were tucked inside his shirt's collar. He kept on complaining about the tasteless ice cream and how he could only feel cold liquid on his tongue as it melted. I thought in silence of Granddad's age that his taste buds had given up on him already albeit he wanted them to work at that moment. One look at him and I knew he didn't appreciate his ice cream so much. He didn't care if he got the melted part or if he got the still frozen ones. By the way he munched on the messy ice cream, it appeared like he just wanted to get it over with. He knew he can't throw it away because I gave it to him. He was by all means trying to show me how much he wanted the ice cream I gave him. I knew better than to rescue him from all the messy paper towels and the half-melted ice cream.

I'm used to be being a silent audience for my Granddad during his snack time. I really want to let Grandfather taste all his favorite food as much and as often as he can when he still has time. I fixed my eyes on Granddad's ice cream and remembered what Ms. Tabo, our professor in human anatomy and physiology once imparted to our class. She said people try to save their riches until they think it's time to spend them but when they get to the point of spending all their loots, they realize they're too old to feel or taste anything. All the luxuries in the world don't matter when the full capacity of the senses have been lost. People are trapped in this cycle of waking up and going to work in the hope that they get their retirement fees in the future. They sometimes fail to enjoy the joyful things around them when they worry too much about tomorrow. They forget to enjoy life, and to celebrate the gift of being alive and kicking. She also added that the weakness of youth is youth itself because when we are young we feel like we have the fountain of youth on our hands and that tomorrow we will still be as lively. As young people, we forget to think about caring for our bodies because we feel like our youth will protect us from harm, then the natural process of aging snaps us back into reality by giving us signs that we've neglected our bodies and that we are indeed only mortals.

I really absorbed every single word Ms. Tabo had shared with us that day although some of my classmates thought she was being too sentimental because she herself is aging. Ms. Tabo even joked about smiling now when you still have teeth than smiling later when you’re toothless. She was being lighthearted about the topic and I enjoyed sitting there listening to her unforgettable words of wisdom. My Human Anatomy and Physiology subject really changed me. Now, more than ever I try to get in touch with my senses, to enjoy being young while I still can but also take care of my body because it's the only one I've got. I sniff the flowers I see, touch every rose petals, listen to music and absorb its essence, watch the sunset and sunrise with awe, savor the taste of wine and of food like I've never encountered them before, and just feel the indescribable warmth of loving and being loved in return. In my heart lies a silent wish for my Grandfather. May he maximize the use of his senses and may he feel all the love around him.

I watched Granddad scoop the last of the ice cream. He motioned me to come closer so I did what was asked of me. He pulled my left ear (my good ear) and whispered the words thank you. I touched the hand holding my ear with both hands and then drew him closer to give him a tight hug. I knew right then that Granddad felt loved, alive and happy. His tears of joy told me so. We hugged for so long despite the warm weather. He smiled one of his happiest smiles and he smelled of chocolate ice cream. It was an unforgettable lazy afternoon after all.