Boulder in the stream

By plumasdeluz

Tue, 12 Jun 2012
  • 404 reads
2 comments
 

People running by so fast
falling scrapping their knees and hands
jumping up and taking off again
aimlessly rapidly moving forward, backwards, sideways
and I am the rock that stands so still
watching as they jet around me
the ancient piece of minerals
stuck to the bottom of the stream
where even little pebbles are brought along
above and in the currents raging
and the boulder thats lodged in the mud
forever there, forever aging.

Certificate U
Poem
Nature

Comments

Submitted by Richard L. Prov... on
Very nice thoughts here; good expressions. Try writing again and tighten up the words, ie falling, scraping knees and hands-- rapidly forward, backwards and sideways-- and a boulder lodged in the mud-- forever here, forever aging-- Keep writing, a very good start. Richard LP
Richard L. Provencher

Submitted by plumasdeluz on
Thank you for the feedback and suggestions, I really appreciate them :)