Precious Pinkie
By ice rivers
- 260 reads
Hey you?
Feeling worthless?
Got money problems that won't go away?
Bankrupt.
Ready to put your head in the oven?
Making that long walk off a short pier?
Taking sincere self-criticism to the extreme?
Lighting up that gas grill?
Wait a minute.
Check out your little finger. I'm looking at mine right now. I'm thinking of my Aunt Rose when she was laid out in her coffin. She looked very different. I suppose the Undertaker did a good enough job but it just didn't look like her. I looked at her hands that were clutching a rosary. I noticed her little finger. I recognized it. I thought on all of the times that I had observed those hands especially when she was smoking Lucky Strikes which she was always doing. She had a way of extending her little finger when she inhaled. I used to kid her about it. The dangers of smoking had not yet been revealed and by the time that they were, it was too late for Rose.
I remembered all those times when the little pinkie bore witness to her index finger as that finger, not the innocent little guy, dialed a number on her phone and ordered three pizzas to be delivered to one of the many people who had pranked her and to whom she was pranking back and how they would have to explain that they hadn't ordered any pizza. Rose is one of the reasons why whenever you order a pizza, you have to give your phone number.
I almost expected her pinkie to rise up from the rosary until I realized that it had extended for the last time. This was my last look.
Okkayy now back to you and your money problems.
How much do you owe?
For how much would you sell your little finger?
Ten grand?
Fifty grand?
We'll get a guy in here to amputate it. It won't hurt much...it'll just be gone. Let's face it, you don't use it that much anyways. You don't smoke and God knows you don't say the rosary. You might have to give up bowling for awhile.
Looking at mine, I'd settle for half a mill.
That's for my relatively useless little finger.
If my little finger is worth half a mill, how much is the whole shebang worth? Toes, hands, head, heart, soul etc.
Starting with a mill for the pinkie, the value goes up fast. Believe me, you don't owe anybody that much.
Worthless?
I don't think so.
Stick around before you cash it in, there's a brand new day on the horizon.
Choose to be.
Save the money.
The miracle is on its way just in case you haven't recognized the miracle when you gazed at your beautiful, useless pinky.
God knows that you owe that much to yourself.
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Comments
Luck Strikes [Lucky Strikes
Luck Strikes [Lucky Strikes or perhaps unlucky strikes].
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Unique and very creative
Unique and very creative response to the inspiration point. Sad but entertaining recollection of your aunt's little finger. In my family, many of us have very curved pinkies, I wonder how much they are worth, being rarer? I very much liked the dark humour at the opening of your peice.
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