When Brian Played Like Dennis Brain

When Brian played like Dennis Brain
His horn of sixpence silver
The people captured were enraptured
And could not leave the hall.
Whenever he trotted with the Mozart concerto
The audience fell victim to a rare form of vertigo.
With lips so pursed and his face stretched tight
He had reversed the notes in sight.
Calling it free transposition
Brian had no competition.
It was so good - his improvising
He shone as if exam revising.
Brandishing horn with little dalliance
Brain-box Brian had many talents.
Apart from playing his musical instrument
He stuffed rare birds without an implement.
But when it came to doing sport
He did anything at all but what he ought.
The gym instructor soon gave up
Seeing how flabby in shorts he looked.
So when the boys wanted to score
They dropped those musical at the door.
Boys will be boys - this Brian knew
But flunking games he got into a stew.
Yet all the time when one is gifted
Your confidence means that you are lifted
Above the thoughts that can depress
Like I'm no good at that or this.
So when to Oxford he was admitted
Some so-called friends were quite embittered.
Probably they were sportsmen who
Could not square pi by twenty-two.
And on the day of graduation
His mother Beth felt such elation.
She dressed so fine affecting class
And looked so snooty on the grass.
Brian himself could not have been prouder
His goal achieved, magna cum laude.