Parables of Clippety (10) - The Medical Room

 

Marni looked as if she were about to cry, she gathered up her handbag and stood up just as another Mexican wave swept across the stadium. She’d only taken a couple of steps down when she paused and placed her hand on her brow. ‘Oh I’m all dizzy again!' She exclaimed and began to topple sideways off the edge of the steps. She tried to steady herself by shifting her foot but her high heel went over on the side, twisting her ankle and she fell down messily, hitting her head on the hand rail and falling into an old man’s lap.

 

Clare shot up and ran down to find her friend with her head cut and bleeding and the alarmed man holding her upright. One of the stewards down below had caught sight of the incident and was rushing up the steps in his high visibility tabard while talking into his radio in a loud, serious voice, requesting that the St John ambulance come up and assist in location 9F.

 

There was a small nucleus of chaos now, on the steps at location 9F. Marni held her hand up to her face, whimpering and muttering something about how stupid she was. Clare thanked the old man for holding her upright and took over, clasping her hands under Marni’s armpits and lowering her gently down onto the step. The first aid people were up within seconds with all their kit. One of them whipped out a piece of lint padding and held it to Marni's head while speaking to her in a very loud voice.

 

 

‘I’m alright, it was just a little trip,’ she said, ‘I was just so dizzy from all the Mexican Waves that’s all.’

 

‘Look Marni,’ shouted a stout woman with black-framed glasses and policemen’s shoes. ‘We’re going to have to keep an eye on you because you’ve had a bang on the head, you’ll have to come with us to the first aid room. It’s okay, it’s the one the players use. You never know, you might see Fabinho!’

 

‘Oh!’ Clare exclaimed and rushed back to the seat to grab her handbag. ‘I’ll need to stay with her, she’s my best friend.’

 

‘Of course you can, Love! You come along with her now, watch your steps. Ooh, you’re both very dressed up today aren’t you.’

 

‘Yes, we’re here on a special occasion.’

 

‘That’s it, we’ve got you. There’s a wheelchair at the bottom of these steps and my colleague will wheel you round to the medical facilities. A doctor will check you over and your friend can come along.’

 

‘I think the match is flatlining a bit now anyway,’ said the young male who looked no more than sixteen as he pushed Marni along in the wheelchair. She felt a bit exposed, ashamed even at being helplessly pushed along at the bottom of the stadium where all the crowd could see her. It occurred to her that Jurgen might be watching and she dropped her head down and stared into her own lap. ‘You’re not going to miss anything,’ continued the young man, ‘there’s a big tv screen in the first aid room.’

 

‘Oh, is there a toilet?’

 

‘Yes, everything you need is in there.’

 

They passed through some double doors, then another set which needed a combination to enter. Once away from the roar of the crowd and the loaded tempo of the football match, they found themselves in a pristine, white room, it was peaceful, otherworldly, the light seemed extra bright. The St John’s Ambulance people waited while Marni went to the toilet then they said goodbye left and the two ladies just sat looking at each other. ‘Those toilets were so pristine, you could have done brain surgery on the seat. Hey the light in here, it’s so bright, it makes you look so young Clare,’ said Marni. ‘It’s like being in heaven. Have I died?’

 

‘I doubt it. Your colour has come back. How’s your head feeling?’

 

‘I can’t feel it to be honest. I can’t feel anything. I feel like I’m floating.’

 

Suddenly the door swung open and a young woman with a very long blonde plait falling down the length of her back entered the room. ‘Which one of you two glamorous ladies has had a knock to the head?’

 

‘Her,’ said Clare.

 

‘We’re just waiting for the doctor,’ Marni exclaimed, wide-eyed like a child. Clare winced and shook her head. 

 

‘Good. I’m the doctor, I’m Doctor Gil but you can call me Marina. Now I just need to shine this torch in your eyes.’ 

 

Marni resisted for a few seconds, turning away, then gave in and looked into the torch with a pained but polite smile on her face . ‘Honestly I’m fine now. I feel a bit embarrassed to be honest.’

 

Doctor Gil pulled out a clipboard from under her arm and proceeded to ask several questions in a brisk manner. ‘Have you vomited? What’s your name? What day is it? How old are you? What’s the date? What did you have for lunch?’

 

‘No...er Marni. It’s Saturday and I’m fifty one, BLT and it’s July the twenty sixth.’

 

‘Ha ha, she’s fifty six. Liar!’ Clare laughed.

 

Doctor Gil tutted and shook her head. ‘You know, we don’t play football in July. It’s August.’

 

‘Sorry, I forget things, it’s just my age.’

 

‘Okay. Well you look alright to me but stick around for as long as you like. Don’t rush off if you’re not feeling right.’

 

The doctor left but she stopped just outside the door and began to chat to somebody. It was a male voice. Clare and Marni could see through a little slit of glass in the door that he was someone tall, a man with glasses and an accent. He and Dr Gil continued to stand and talk for a couple of minutes, laughing occasionally, possibly flirting with each other.

 

‘Oh my god,’ said Clare with a gasp. 

 

‘Brace! Brace!’ Marni shouted, ‘It’s only fucking….him!’

 

‘Sshshshs. Operation Clippetty Klopp. Get yourself into stealth mode!’

 

The door opened a few feet, a strong manly hand held onto the handle and the tall, strong body attached to it stood there in silence for a while, then the handsome Germanic head spoke in smooth, perfect English. ‘Oh what have we here then, a casualty. Marina just informed me that one of you fell on the steps in our stadium.’ He smiled and his entire presence seemed to glow within the room. In fact, Marni even imagined a set of large, white wings protruding from above his shoulders.

 

‘I...I fell, it was during the Mexican Wave,’ she said breathlessly.

 

‘Aah, I see. The crowd was very lively today. It was only the second game of the season and a very exciting match.’ Jurgen walked slowly towards the ladies and perched on the arm of a sofa and spread out his long legs, just beside where they were seated. Indeed he seemed to fill the entire space with his presence. He held his hand up to his throat. ‘I almost lost my voice. Did you come far to see us today?’ 

 

Clare put on a special voice, pulled a peculiar, sycophantic face which overflowed with the expression of her affection for the man. ‘We came up from Birm….from the midlands area. We’re long time Liverpool fans, for decades actually and great admirers of,’ she laughed, ‘you, I mean, yourself. Sorry forgive me, I never expected to meet you like this.’

 

‘Well of course there were many before me who paved the way. I follow in the footsteps of Kenny Dalglish as you know, and er Graham Souness.’

 

‘Oh yes, we know, we know,’ said Marni, ‘but I think, and I know Clare will agree with me on this, there has never been another like you, not in any team anywhere in the world.’

 

Jurgen laughed and shook his head. Holding out his hands, he said, ‘Well that’s a nice thing to say but I don’t think I agree, I mean Helenio Herrera….’

 

‘We’re not experts,’ said Clare, shaking her head.

 

‘Brian Clough,’ Marni blurted out randomly, ‘he was a one-off.’

 

There was an awkward pause. ‘Yes,’ Jergen frowned and clapped his hands together, bringing an abrupt change to the atmosphere. ‘So, you ladies have got transport home, haven’t you? It’s because in a minute, there will be a couple of players in this room and I don’t mean to be rude but they will be sweaty and the language they use may not be suitable for ladies.’

 

‘My car’s in the main car park. It’s actually quite close…although it might be a bit far for her to walk, with her injury I mean, she twisted her ankle too.’

 

‘It’s a white Audi,’ Marni said.

 

‘You can go fetch it and bring it around to the back here, to the private car park, the team car park I mean. There’s a security guy in the hut outside, Alan, that’s his name, I can radio him and tell him to let you through.’