Mumbles From The Madhouse: Chapter Two

Thirty blank faces looked past, through, and around her. ‘What do you want, a fucking medal?’ asked a young woman sitting by the window. ‘Ask, Freda there,’ she motioned with her head towards a lady sitting opposite. ‘She’ll make you one. A nice chocolate one.’ She laughed around a throat filled with phlegm and spat on the carpet beside her chair.

The lady that the spitter had pointed out was playing with a ball of faeces, rolling it around in her hand and passing it between her fingers.

Another woman rocked backwards and forwards keeping up a monotonous moaning.

A large lady with a reedy, operatic voice and black pegs for teeth, although she didn't look very old, sang the opening lines of "Bless This House Oh Lord We Pray."

A man was picking his nose and wiping his produce on the side of the chair.

Angie went back into the corridor with a sense of purpose. She had something to do. She looked for signs and the second door on the right was a bathroom. On the top shelf of a unit she found some mediwipes, grabbing a wad of them she wet half under the tap and vigorously soaped one before going back into the lounge. She marched up to the lady playing in her filth.

‘Hello Dear,’ she said, confidently, ‘I'm just going to give you a little wash to make you feel a bit fresher. The faeces had found its way into the lady's mouth. Without any hesitation, Angie did a mouthswipe with her finger, clearing the mess that the woman was chewing. ‘Let's get that out of there, shall we. It’s nasty, isn't it?’

The woman bit hard on Angie’s finger and she cried out in alarm. A man in the far corner laughed. ‘She'll `ave yer, she will.’

‘Aye, if she doesn’t eat her first,’ agreed the spitter.

At least there was some form of interaction between these broken human beings, they weren't so locked into their private catatonia that they were beyond reach. That gave her something to work with.

Angie tried to get her finger, and the poo, out of the woman’s mouth. It was mixed with saliva and stinking, brown dribble ran down her chin.

‘Gerroff,’ yelled the woman and Angie took advantage of the relaxing jaw to finish clearing the woman’s mouth.

‘Now then, how about that wash, eh?’ She cleaned the lady's face and hands. She had to find somebody to attend to her properly. She’d been on the unit for almost ten minutes and still hadn't seen a member of staff. So much for not leaving the patients unattended.

She rang the call button high up on the wall near the door and waited until, eight minutes later a young woman bustled into the room in the wake of an aroma of stale cigarettes. She had an inked out tattoo on her forearm, a teardrop on her cheek and she had "Jordan Forever" tattooed across the back of her left hand. Her brown hair was greasy and unkempt. If it hadn't been for the crumpled green uniform, Angie would have taken her for a resident rather than staff.

‘Who rang that bloody bell?’ She yelled as she flounced into the room. ‘I was on my break and the last thing I want to hear is these sodding bells going off all over the place. Was it you Gwen?’

The lady who had kept up a constant stream of hymns stopped singing and looked at the Care Assistant innocently.

‘No dear, not me. Perhaps it was the Lord.’

On getting into the room properly the girl noticed Angie behind the door. ‘Oh, you’re here then. I’m guessing you're the new woman. Did you ring?’

‘Yes, It was me,’ Angie said. ‘I'm the new OT. There were no staff on the ward and this lady needs some attention.’

‘They all need bloody attention,’ said the girl. ‘Has she shit herself, again? They’ve written her up for too much Duphalac. I keep telling them. Elsa you're a dirty cow, you are.’ She
turned her attention back to Angie. ‘I'm Linda, don't worry about Elsa, I'll be seeing to her after lunch, she's on the bath roster.’

A lady had soiled herself and they were going to make her wait for another three hours to be cleaned properly? Angie moved closer to Linda so that she could talk confidentially and almost reeled backwards as the smell of body odour hit her. Linda was unaware of her problem.

‘She needs bathing now, she's soiled herself. Do it.’

On hearing the disapproval and tone, Linda bristled. ‘Yeah, well I'm busy, right? I'll see to her when I can.’ She stalked out of the room but turned at the door. ‘Listen; can I give you a word of advice? Don’t come in here rocking the boat, eh? Trust me; I’ve seen your type before. Keep your head down and you'll be okay. I've seen lots of do-gooders come and go in here and not many of them last very long. Know what I mean?’

She nodded at Angie to emphasise her words. And then she was gone.

Angie didn’t know what she meant. But she intended to find out.