Jeremy Corbyn backs the destruction of mankind

Cherry

By Terrence Oblong

Wed, 02 Dec 2015
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4 comments
 

The UK media had only one story - Jeremy Corbyn's refusal to join the 'Against the Meteor' Facebook group. 'Corbyn's support for meteor that will wipe out mankind', ran the headline in the Sun, Mail, Guardian and Times.  Corbyn and his supporters were so busy talking 'practical solutions' that they completely failed to 'tweet against armagedon', or even to change their facebook profiles to say 'don't wipe out humanity'.

 

Corbyn was also widely criticised for missing the caviar and champagne reception at the Stop the Meteor Conference he and the prime minister attended, as he 'didn't think the end of mankind was important', or, as Corby would put it, he was busy talking to scientists about how to stop the meteor.

 

Corby went on to describe in detail an anti-meteor plan he had developed with the scientific experts - turning the UK's trident warheads on the meteor and blasting it into small fragments that would disentegrate in the Earth's atmosphere, thus rendering it harmless.

 

Or, to quote the Sun headline, 'Corbyn wants to leave us defenceless'.  Corbyn's desire to rid the UK of its nukes will leave us exposed to every terrorist in the world, ran the main feature in the last newspaper mankind would ever print.

 

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Comments

Submitted by Kurt Rellians on

Poor old Corby! He can't do anything right! That's one way of getting rid of Trident!
If only we could get Islamic State to stand in one place well away from civilians (out in the desert perhaps), maybe we could get rid of Trident on them?
Great satire!

Submitted by Terrence Oblong on

Thanks Kurt. I'm just bemused by how idiotic the coverage is, half the population are apparently terrorists because they oppose random bombing of places where there might be some bad people, or possibly not. Come happy bombs and fall on slough or what.

 

Submitted by forest_for_ever on

We never seem to learn do we.  In our frustration against a hidden enemy we simply want to 'Zap the bastards'.  Nukes have never helped the world, but whilst others have them... and as for the media!  Well they have a place in this world.  Let's hope it is far far away.  As they often are from the truth.

 

Submitted by Kurt Rellians on

I would actually love to 'zap the bastards' but of course the real world isn't that simple and most of us do know it, particularly after the lengthy debates and news coverage in recent days over whether the UK can sanction bombing raids over Syria.
Without nuclear weapons over the years it probably is a lot more likely that the West and the USSR would have come to blows more often, in bigger proxy wars. Luckily none of the leaders of any nuclear powers showed any inclination to put it to any real use, and lets hope it stays that way forever. I would not get rid of the deterrent myself. Who knows who might start to bully us if we didn't have it? Hopefully Islamic State will never be allowed to acquire it. They seem to be the most likely candidate for its misuse at the moment. I have to admit to attending the CND dedicated/organised Glastonbury Rock Festival in the late eighties, and being there for the music, not because I agreed with CND!
The media coverage keeps changing with every Labour Party split, and every faux pas from Cameron. One minute I think the Labour Party have gone terribly soft, and I start panicking because there's no respectable caring protective party left to vote for, and the next minute we're all together in agreement and horror as the next terror incident unites us in grief. And all the time there's the nagging accusation that the top dogs of our world have everything sewn up and they won't tell us everything. There is a plan but we just don't know whether they are on our side or whether they're just using us to get themselves richer. Who can we believe?