Result! part 2.
And now if I'm honest, though I never mentioned it at the time, I'm scared of how I'll feel when I see the one breast dangling lonely on my chest next to an ugly scar, and when my bra constantly rides up on one side, I'll hate that. I'm seriously thinking of having both boobs off. They said they would do it if I wanted; told me to go away and think it over. When I asked John what he thought, he said it was up to me, but I wanted an opinion. I know it's up to me, but it's a big decision. Why don't people tell you their thoughts on the matter when you ask for an opinion, yet when you don't ask, they are all too happy to supply it.
Lots of women opt for a double mastectomy, not because the cancer might spread from one breast to the other, because it doesn't jump like that. The cancer in the one breast spreads to surrounding areas and through the lymphatic system, and the unaffected breast has the same chance of getting cancer as any other breast. But many women choose a double mastectomy because they don't want to take the chance of getting breast cancer again. There are also those who, like me, worry about that, but who would opt for the double because they prefer symmetry. I want, like one woman I read about, to get up in the morning and throw on a T shirt to walk the dogs, and not have to first battle with a bra trying to arrange matching breasts, but if I tell them to take both, would it just be double the pain and double the ugly? The symmetry would be good, and yes, and a bra might still ride up, but then, most of the time I wouldn't need to wear one. Then again, with one breast, I might still feel like a woman - I really don't know - there's no one to ask except John, who with the best intentions says, 'It's up to you.' Help!