Post mortem results

Gold cherry

By love_writing

Wed, 26 Aug 2015
  • 4051 reads
17 comments
 

Post mortem results

 

lie in a brown Please do not bend envelope

 with the old address and our separate surnames written

in different coloured ink        yours black.        Mine blue

 

     the results do not say much really, don’t offer any

–ok so that was the reason and with that comes a resolution

the resolution (someone said) is that there is no resolution

 

      I had waited to hear of some strange defect or illness

or some disease that would (someone else said) mean that

you were better off         not            being.            Here 

 

      the nothingness of it all, the blankness of the page

of the results, gave no relief to that image which kept

replaying in my head, replays even now. Can’t look at

 

       that last photo, the very last square photo; your

head wrapped in a white bandage, slit eyes shut, your face

puffy, purple, blue, tiny. Our photo at your side. A Teddy.

 

       Had it been worth the wait, the wait for the results?

The -I can’t say it- the cutting the examining, the wrapping you

back up to look like a mummy. No.    

    

       Just one of those things, Dr Nobody had said sliding

the brown envelope across her desk to me; the cord was

wrapped around six times but that happened after. After.

Certificate 18
Poem
Inspiration Point (work that responds to our weekly writing cue)
Autobiography

Comments

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Very sad. I expect if you are waiting for a possible explanation if feels like it may solve something for you, though probably it wouldn't really make a difference to the shattering bereavement. The 'whether to have a PM or not' must be so hard, though the feeling something from it may help towards the care of someone else's ill child. Rhiannon

 

Submitted by love_writing on

Yes I think thats it Rhiannon, the waiting for the answer - then the 'nothing' - but it doesnt change the outcome. Thank you for the read and comment most appreciated.

love_writing

Submitted by Bee on

I feel the emptiness. No answers are good enough, but we need them.

Bee

Submitted by love_writing on

Thank you Bee, thats very true.

love_writing

Submitted by love_writing on

Thank you eds :)

love_writing

Submitted by Insertponceyfre... on

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Submitted by love_writing on

Thank you so much for this ed's...I'm thrilled :)

love_writing

Submitted by VeraClark on

The expectation of some clarity and cause is so sharply delivered in this, it's breathtaking when no news comes after such intolerable intrusion. A staggering piece.  Technically, I think your font changes and inner voice are very effective, bring even more to the piece and that such well composed metrics never miss a beat. 

 

Submitted by love_writing on

Thank you Vera for your lovely thoughtful comment :) I wasnt sure about the font/ italics etc but it was what I kept going back to, so I am glad you found it worked. 

love_writing

Submitted by london_calling79 on

A broken, stuttering voice delivering blunt truths. Want to read it again but the emotional journey is torture. Fantastic writing.

 

Submitted by love_writing on

Thank you lc that means a lot :) 

love_writing

Submitted by EB on

The results are cold and clinical compared to the reality, and  'Just one of those things,' is just plain cruel. 

Submitted by love_writing on

Hi EB, thanks for your comment. Thats how results can often be can't they - cold and clinical on paper. Yes Dr Nobody wasnt very good with empathy :)

love_writing

Submitted by Philip Sidney on

So very painful.  The final word suggesting so much.  A difficult but illuminating read.

Submitted by love_writing on

Thank you ps. It has been building up a while and has been theraputic to write :)

love_writing

Submitted by airyfairy on

The structure really does work with the content.  The poem grabs you and won't let go.  The sadness, the disappointment, the despair, all conveyed with precision but no loss of emotion.  I am glad to hear you found it therapeutic to write.  It would be good if Dr Nobody was made to read it.

Submitted by love_writing on

Thank you airyfairy, pleased you found the structure worked. I had been a bit unsure but just went with it :)

love_writing