BBC TV Listings, Wednesday January 21st 2032.
BBC TV Listings, Wednesday January 21st 2032.
06.00 Dame Kathryn Jenkins sings ‘Brexitannia Rules the Waves’ followed by the national anthem.
06.05-06.10 Government announcement: Updates on the latest Covid figures and food, fuel and energy shortages
06.10-09.00 Good Morning with Nigel and Nadine. Joining Nigel Farage and Nadine Dorres on the sofa this morning are: National treasures Lord and Lady Cameron; American icon John Voight, who is in the UK campaigning in favour of the government’s new ‘guns for all’ legislation; and Ted Nugent who will be playing songs from his latest album, Stop the Steal (Obama is the f***in’ devil).
09.00-10.00 Top tips for Stay-at-Home Mums. Ann Widdecombe and her panel offer everyday lifestyle tips for the nation’s hard-working mums. Includes Ann’s regular features: the art of embroidery; sharp elbows when hunting for bargains; make do and mend; and how to honour your husband in the kitchen and the bedroom.
10.00-11.00 Cookery Today with Princess Nut-Nut. Everyone’s favourite plant-based chef Princess Nut-Nut shows you how to make the most of your government food vouchers.
11.00-12.00 Thanksgiving service. Live from Westminster Abbey we celebrate the ten-years anniversary since the ruling Conservative government defeated the hated Covid 19 virus.
12.00-12.30 Local news, including Thanksgiving services in your area for the ten-years anniversary of the ruling Conservative government’s defeat of the hated Covid 19 virus.
12.30-13.30 National and international news, including reports from Thanksgiving services from around the country to celebrate the ten-years anniversary of the ruling Conservative government’s defeat of the hated Covid 19 virus.
13.30-15.30 Live coverage of a special reception hosted by King Andrew and Queen Fergie to celebrate 22 years of Conservative rule.
15.30-16.30 Antiques Road Challenge. Matt Hancock and Anne Marie Trevelyan go head-to-head in this exciting antiques-based contest. Tonight, Matt finds a bargain when he discovers a rare 18th century love wand.
16.30-18.00 Pointless special. Conservative politicians, past and present, bid to win the Pointless trophy.
18.00-18.30 International and national news. Updates on the looming war with the EU.
18.30-19.00 Local news. Including the popular item, Dig Your Own Air Raid Shelter.
19.00-19.10 Party political broadcast on behalf of the Conservative Party.
19.10-20.00 The One Show with Piers Morgan. A special edition in which Piers visits US President Don Trump jnr at his Mar-a-largo estate. With the UK-US trade agreement moving ever closer, President Trump II will be outlining the benefits the deal will bring to the UK, focusing on private health care, genetically modified beef, easier access for Brits to buy guns, and the upcoming take-over of ITV by Fox. Look out for a version of Proud to be an American sung by first lady Kimberly Guilfoyle, especially for all of her fans in the UK.
20.00-22.00 Film: Bravo Two EU. Fact based action thriller about two British patriots who are parachuted into Europe to hunt down a rogue English businessman who has been agitating to re-join the hated bloc. (Contains scenes of violence and food shortages).
22.00 News at Ten. Updates on the looming war with the EU.
22.30-23.30 Great Thinkers of our Time. Host Iain Dunkin Smith interviews Andrew Bridgen. Iain and Andrew discuss euthanising the homeless.
23.40-23.50 National Anthem and goodnight.
06.00 National anthem.
06.05-09.00 Kids TV. Everybody’s favourite childrens entertainers Bozo Boris and Dilyn the dog, live from the magic garden. Today, Dilyn has been pooping on the grass again. Join Bozo as he hunts for Dilyn’s turds and gives them all a jolly good shine.
09.00-10.00 Today in Court special. Live from the Old Bailey as former SNP MPs receive their sentences for sedition.
10.00-13.00 World Football Soccer League. Highlights from yesterday’s games, including: Juve Google v Newcastle Emirates; Real Facebook v Manchester Microsoft; Inter Miami v Aston Paypal.
13.00-14.30 Afternoon concert. Live music celebrating 22 years of Conservative rule. Introduced by Prime Minister Liz Truss. Including performances by those ever-popular chart toppers Wilf Johnson and Tory Girlz.
14.30-16.30 Documentary about the Conservatives record breaking 22 years in office. Tonight: The Royal Navy’s War against Migrants. Also, BBC Director-General Steve Baker explains how all BBC and government appointees are now rigorously vetted in the ongoing war against Wokeness and Remainerism. (Repeat)
16.30-17.30 Patriotic Poetry Please! Jacob Rees-Mogg’s ground-breaking series. Tonight, Jacob investigates Victorian poetry and explains why the government’s law that all poetry must rhyme is so important for the health of the nation.
17.30-18.30 A History of English Theatre. Laurence Fox on why Shakespeare was a true-blue Conservative, an anti-woke pioneer, and not at all gay.
18.30-20.00 The English Civil Wars. Michael Fabricant’s ground-breaking series. Tonight: The Terrors of Cromwell’s Hated Communist Interregnum and the glory and magnificence of Charles II and the Restoration.
20.00-22.00 Evening prayers and choral music from Eton.
22.00-23.00 Newsnight with Dan Wooton.
23.00-23.45 A Personal View. Tonight, the Archbishop of Canterbury gives thanks to God for 22 years of uninterrupted Tory rule.
23.45-23.55 Government announcement: Operation Try and Keep Warm. Details of where the elderly can pick up their free survival blankets.
23.55 National anthem and goodnight.