You Know How It Is...

Cherry

By Silver Spun Sand

Fri, 06 May 2011
  • 4921 reads
21 comments
 

You hear a fragment
of a tune; there were
gulls, and green lights,
and pink, plastic sandals...

a cafe on the beach –
a candle that flickered,
so died in the breeze...
a glance you shared...

her footprints on washed,
wet sand, and a time
her barefoot toes brushed
yours, making stars collide.

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Comments

Submitted by fatboy74 on
I love this poem Tina, unlike me you are not afraid to write shorter poems - this is wonderful. :-)

 

Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
So pleased you enjoyed, fb;-) Less can often be more, as they say;-) Tina

 

Submitted by Highhat on
Amazing how music can set the memory alight Tina.A very atmospheric poem. I enjoyed it. ;)Pia

Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
Music is so evocative, you are right, Pia. Thanks for letting me know you enjoyed;-) Tina

 

Submitted by maisie on
i especially enjoyed the first two stanzas. I think you could tidy it up a little yet, and the last one - i'm not sure about personally. tis your poem tho, and please only take my suggestions if they suit your style... thanks

maisie angel Guess what?  I'm still alive!

Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
I guess we all have our own style of writing, you are right there, maisie;-) Pleased you enjoyed. Tina

 

Submitted by mikepyro on
I think the use of the duel ... Isn't needed since the ideas sorta flow into one another. Makes it easier to trip up and feels rather overdramatic which your writing usually isnt I really enjoyed the piece. Simple and powerful and captures this emotion in a way that doesn't feel sappy. I psrticularly enjoyed the last few lines.

Give me the beat boys and free my soul! I wanna getta lost in ya rock n' roll and drift away. Drift away...

Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
Many thanks for reading, mike and for your comments. I'm glad you liked it;-) Tina

 

Submitted by seashore on
I'm a sucker for short poems that say a lot and this does. Love the last stanza especially.

Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
Coral - I guess we're all suckers for one thing or the other. Many thanks for reading;-) Tina

 

Submitted by oldpesky on
Loved this. And I think the last stanza where stars collide is brilliant. Got me right where you aimed.

Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
Ta for that oldpesky...it seems I'm a much better aim with poetry than I am with darts. Not that I've played for years, mind. Many thanks for reading. Glad you liked. Tina

 

Submitted by RachelPatricia on
Another stunning piece from the terrific Tina - last lines got me right where they got oldpesky! Just beautiful, as always, and thoroughly enjoyed :) Rachel xx

Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
Rachel - so good to hear from you. Thanks so much for reading, and for your words. Tina xx

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on
Isn't it wonderful, how a piece of music can conjure up so many memories. Thankyou Tina for sharing your memories with us the reader. I would love to know what piece of music, helped you to write such a beautiful poem. Jenny.

 

Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
Hi there Jenny, not sure if this song is before your time, but indeed it was 'If' by a seventies group called 'Bread'. Such a beautiful tune and the lyrics are so very evocative. Many thanks for your lovely comment, and 'now you know', as they say;-) Tina

 

Submitted by hilary west on
Loved this one - a delight !

 

Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
Many thanks, hilary;-) Tina

 

Submitted by MistakenMagic on
"and a time her barefoot toes brushed yours, making stars collide." - Such a wonderful ending, Tina! The lines really do explode off the page. Very well done on the cherry :) Magic xxx

 

Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
Hi there, Magic. Thanks for taking time out to read this, and I hope you are having a good week;-) Tina xxx

 

Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
Thanks, Nathan;-) Tina x