Bedtime Blues

Gold cherry
Poem of the week

By hoalarg1

Wed, 01 Sep 2021
  • 1745 reads
14 comments
 

I find myself here again
faking sleep
sort of blind, mostly deaf
trailing behind the world's axis
unable to reply to being left behind.

At my side, she lies
her breathing an upholstery of the night
(the harbour wall I still cling to)
she dreams of reaching me sooner.

Yet I remain more tangled
the more I rock and turn
and trawl the ocean floors
kicking free anything that sparkles
aware of my drifting suspension. 

And the bed I made, remade
the one I keep going back to
assumes my familiar shape
the calloused mattress
its lumps and humps
still promising to keep my secrets.

 

Certificate U
Poem

Comments

Submitted by Ewan on

This striking piece of poetry is our Pick of the Day. If you find language like
"sewing double-shot coffees to dry lips" as striking as I do, please share and or retweet this, dear members.

Author Page at the 'Zon
 

Submitted by hoalarg1 on

 Thank you for the awards and your kind words, Ewan.

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on

Some wonderful descriptions in this poem and so unique too.

Jenny.

 

Submitted by hoalarg1 on

 
Thank you, Jenny. Good of you to read and comment.

 

Submitted by Turlough on

Your poem contains some excellent imagery and a sleepless situation I can relate to myself.

I particularly liked ...

'the calloused mattress
its lumps and humps
promises to keep my secrets
under the spell of fitted sheets

Very good indeed!

Turlough

Turlough

Submitted by hoalarg1 on

 
Much appreciated, Turlough. I'm glad you liked the imagery here.

 

Submitted by Nolan on

Good poem think of Mr Tambourine man too.I also had a big problem with sleep I mean serious, can't fall asleep, can't get up. But now I'm OK seems like I'm over it it could be age. Anyway I sleep very well now years already.

Cheers Adam keep well && Nolan

 

Submitted by hoalarg1 on

Glad to hear you're getting better sleep now. Thanks for commenting!

 

Submitted by airyfairy on

This beautifully written piece draws the reader right in to the restlessness and uncertainty of a sleepless night, and it's our Poem of the Week! Congratulations! 

Submitted by celticman on

lots of sleepless nights. This is one to savour

 

Submitted by hoalarg1 on

Thank you!

 

Submitted by Nolan on

Viktor Frankl said if you can't sleep try to stay awake, it's according to his method of "paradoxical intention". Actually it does work for a lot of things. Cheers &

 

Submitted by drew_gummerson on

Great atmosphere... 

 

Submitted by hoalarg1 on

Thanks, Drew.