The Home
By monodemo
- 2120 reads
Teardrops form like rain from her eyes,
‘Where are they?’ she aches, as she cries,
She sits in wait of their return,
‘Why am I here?’ she says with concern,
With her coat and frame at the ready,
The legs beneath her shaking, unsteady,
‘Come to your room, Mrs Logan!’ they urge,
A cascade of teardrops fall and emerge,
Her poor eyes, sore from crying,
Inside she is slowly dying,
Unable to understand why,
They left her there, and said goodbye,
To go from her house, her own sanctuary,
To a small room, bare, eerie,
Her mind a circus in a fishbowl,
Just wanting her kids to touch, console,
Her precious heart from all this madness,
Of leaving her there, full of sadness,
She understood she had done a good job,
Raising twelve kids, yet her heart still throbs,
For one to come and rescue her,
Take her away, her head all a blur,
She wants her chair, her bed, her house,
‘Come and I promise to live quietly like a mouse!’,
‘Come, save me please!’ she whispers to God,
She pulled and she thrashed, stopped and then sobbed,
This isn’t the course her life should go,
She kicked and screamed, ‘no, no, no!’,
In the end they called her daughter,
Going like a lamb for slaughter,
Settling her until she slept,
Sitting in the carpark, she just wept,
‘What have we done?’ she asked herself,
Four years caring, a drain in itself,
For its been four years since her brother died,
Her mothers memory since, locked deep inside,
Confusion she saw as she went to sleep,
Then out the room she slowly creeped,
Inconsolable, she waited, crying,
The twelve, now eleven, hearts slowly dying ,
Would you ever put your mother in a home?
Ripping her from comfort, afraid, alone?
I firmly think it takes a strong person,
To pack up belongings, and make the insertion!
Mam did that over the weekend,
Nanny now in a home ‘til the end!
- Log in to post comments
Comments
phew, it's a toughie. No
phew, it's a toughie. No right or wrong answers. My mum went into a home. I think it was the right thing. But I was glad when she died.
- Log in to post comments
I'm so sorry you're going
I'm so sorry you're going through this mono, it's always such a tough thing to do. I've seen your earlier pieces of writing about how you worked so hard as a family to share looking after her at home. You have all done so much for her and you should be very proud of yourselves. Hope to see more from you soon - well deserved cherries!
- Log in to post comments
What a difficult situation.
What a difficult situation. You can only do what is humanly possible and thankfully there are suitable facilities for people who need more intense and complex care than loved ones can themselves provide. What a lovely photograph of her. She is very lucky to have family who care so much.
- Log in to post comments
Soul Moving*
Touched me in many ways in a soul moving read... written by writer that move souls. (well done)
- Log in to post comments
A deeply felt poem; and if it
A deeply felt poem; and if it's possible to say what I liked, it was how you told the story from both sides, which further emphasised the heartbreak. I have been fortunate, in that all my family have died while I lived in the UK and they in Australia, so I never had to go through what your poem conveys; thank you for sharing this.
Dougie Moody
- Log in to post comments
Hopefully she will gradually
Hopefully she will gradually settle and find the surroundings and people interesting, and her memories of before becoming more hazy, she will become content and happy though maybe still feeling confused. Rhiannon
- Log in to post comments
Monodemo's heart wrenching
Monodemo's heart wrenching poem is Pick of the Day. Please do share if you can
- Log in to post comments
Congratulations from me too
Congratulations from me too Mono - very well deserved golden cherries!
- Log in to post comments
Congratulations on the golden
Congratulations on the golden cherries. This really is a wonderful poem. I worked in Adult Services for a while, and saw families going through this dilemma. There are no easy answers and you're right, it does take courage to make that decision for someone else, knowing that they don't appreciate it's in their best interests. We were just approaching that point with my father when he died, and he was so dead against going into a home I know it would have been a terrible struggle. I hope your Nanny will settle and your Mam will take comfort knowing it is for the best and is done with love.
- Log in to post comments
Her mind a circus in a
Her mind a circus in a fishbowl
That's a brilliant line.
Every time, the whole situation is one of mental torture for the poor elderly person and for the family but struggling on without the care home is even harder.
I hope your Nanny settles in and finds peace there.
Turlough
- Log in to post comments
None of us want to do this,
None of us want to do this, or have this choice made for us, but so often sadly it isn't a choice.
A very moving piece.
- Log in to post comments