In perpetuity

Gold cherry

By Parson Thru

Sat, 10 Aug 2019
  • 8053 reads
25 comments
 

You grab what peace you can
Knowing this is how it’s going to be

The window’s cracked open
Curtains moving in the wind

Your watch says twenty-five to three
Perhaps it is

The house is deadly quiet
Save the ringing in your ears

In the garage, leans a bicycle
Cleaned, oiled, adjusted

A guitar stands in the corner
Beneath a chequered shirt

The wind blasts deserted streets
Rain spatters the glass

But the house is deadly quiet
Save the ringing in your ears

https://soundcloud.com/parson-thru/in-perpetuity-parson-thru

Certificate U
Poem
Miscellaneous
Inspiration Point (work that responds to our weekly writing cue)

Comments

Submitted by Parson Thru on

Thank you for the cherries. X

Parson Thru

Submitted by Nolan on

Sounds like a rapture scenario. Sorry but you've been left behind.

All the best Mr Parson!

 

Submitted by Parson Thru on

Hi Nolan. Trials and tribulations.

If rapture admits guitars and bicycles, I might be in. If not, I'd rather be left behind. Might need to renew my visa to qualify, anyway.

All the best to you, Mr Nolan! And thanks for the education! :)

Parson Thru

Submitted by Nolan on

Well the good news is we'll have lots of friends! &&

 

Submitted by Parson Thru on

Yep! :)))

Parson Thru

Submitted by airyfairy on

Love the mystery of this, Parson.  All sorts of scenarios going through my head, but perhaps it doesn't have or need a scenario.  It just is.  

Submitted by Parson Thru on

Hi airyfairy. Your scenarios are as valid as any I might have intended. It just is.

Parson Thru

Submitted by airyfairy on

Haunting and provoking of very much thought.  This is our Facebook and Twitter Pick of the Day!  Do please share/retweet if you enjoy it too.

Picture:  Pixabay Creative Commons

Submitted by Parson Thru on

Thank you!!! Very grateful. X

Parson Thru

Submitted by celticman on

there's a watchful coolness, I like it. 

 

Submitted by Parson Thru on

Cheers celt. Don't miss the Perseids. San Lorenzo's tears.

Parson Thru

Submitted by Di_Hard on

this is one of your intense mood creations, the stillness (I hope not loneliness) in this place, and the weather/life disturbing outside. And the wondering what conversation caused the ringing in your ears. Covers the same weather as Jenny's Periods of Joy but with an utterly different emotion. The bike ready but going nowhere, the guitar ready (under a checked shirt like the checkered flag in racing?) but silent. Maybe because you say "deathly silence" but it feels like you are a ghost. It's an amazing poem, so much in so little. Leaves my brain ringing :0)

 

Submitted by Parson Thru on

Hi Di. I hope you're well.

Descent into the maelstrom wouldn't be a million miles off.

The silence is intentionally "deadly".

On a positive note, I sense there might be some inspiration. If I dare to put it into print.

Thanks for the lovely words.

Parson Thru

Submitted by Insertponceyfre... on

I totally missed the soundcloud link at the bottom! It is really nice to to hear things as they were intended to be heard - thank you parson. Could you please put this in the IP category so people can see it if they look there? It might encourage someone else

 

Submitted by Parson Thru on

Hi insert. There's an interesting point there. I couldn't get the ending (cadence?) right, or as I heard it in my head. I'd need to rehearse it more, which is tricky at the moment. The crux of the recording issue, I suppose: performance. There's a fascinating dynamic there, in terms of writing/directing/performing and the gap (or not) between concept and final performance / the discovery and creative aspect of interpretation when the writer and performer are not the same person. And how that aspect works with subjectivity and the writer / reader relationship. Fascinating.

Parson Thru

Submitted by Insertponceyfre... on

You're right - and while, of course, once you've written something it stops being your personal property with your interpretation and becomes whatever the reader reads it as being, I think these readings add a really interesting dimension to the mix. About the not getting it quite as you wanted it to be: there's a limit to how many times you can try - I had three goes and then thought 'sod it' and pressed save smiley

 

Submitted by Parson Thru on

Exacto!!! :)

Parson Thru

Submitted by catherine poarch on

I enjoyed this and then I listened to it read aloud and it upped the effect ten fold. Really atmospheric. I had to look up perpetuity, though! smiley

 

Submitted by Parson Thru on

Thanks Catherine. I'm always having to look things up. :)

Parson Thru

Submitted by Di_Hard on

i hadn't noticed the link either, I'm sorry. I found the reading made me think more of how solitary the narrator was, because of the spaces you left between sentences, like empty rooms. Also, "glass" with a quick vowel makes the line so much more how weather sounds, it shines out like a live thing, as you must have intended, and my southy glarse had dimmed that. I hope you read more of your work! And I hope you will write about where you are now if you can bear it. There is a quote which I can't remember  how a writer is lying if they are silent. Not sure about that, but is maybe a build up of some sort might help to let out? It can never be wrong to make something beautiful even if it cuts the reader

 

Submitted by Parson Thru on

Hi Di. It's the only way I can say it. Causes problems (initially) teaching English in Spain. Almost always resolved with the goodwill of students. Almost. I have been told I can't speak English.

As the writing just spills out anyway, I'm sure there'll be more. Some things are a little too private, but that can be a spur to creative writing in itself. Take care. Glarse! I spent 9 years in London and another 9 in the South West. Those years hardly made a dent in my accent. :)

Parson Thru

Submitted by Tom Brown on

It does sound like a very unfortunate situation.

 

Submitted by Parson Thru on

Not wrong, Tom. Complex. Good and bad. Life.

Parson Thru

Submitted by luigi_pagano on

Hi Kevin, I understand perfectly what you say about the interpretation of a piece when the writer and performer are not the same person. I had poems of mine read by a friend and they sounded marvellous but with my rendition they came across as flat and ordinary. The skill of the narrator can certainly enhance the appreciation. Anyway for what is worth my verdict is: poem superb, A++, recitation A-.

Best, Luigi

 

Submitted by Parson Thru on

Hi Luigi. Hope all is well. I worked out some years ago that I'm not really a performer. I’m not sure why, or whether that can be fixed. It would be great to emulate a dear friend of ours and write scripts to watch what actors do with them. Lovely to hear from you. Thanks for the ratings.

Parson Thru