Autobiography

Pursed numbness.

Pursed numbness. As i wretch for more. Pursed and closed, with an open mind, a breast for a score. My need for shakes, as rumbles go round. The glass and a stretch. A stretch and a line.

The cottage in winter

ow, stop hitting me with that bit of lead

Mystery.

you're just a boy, in this world. that nobody wants to be. you think you're all that, it has to be just about you. you make the rules, and all the games. there is no bargaining

Second Time Around

Left him for good this time, ma.

don't hold pity though

STOP laughing behind his back DON'T stare. It's NOT nice and he DOESN'T deserve it. The clouds are DARK with STINGING rain STABBING at his life BLEEDING it away. Don't hold pity though

for all the friends in the world

for all the friends in the world no advice can comfort hugs won't work what a smile would do to me from blue for all the friends in the world i'd rather have you.

I got a tattoo today.

I got a tattoo today to protect my soul. I got a tattoo today to scare you away. It is a devil, a demonic, a dragon. My home so they say. I got scared. I got scarred.

after the voices

after the voices came for the night, then again oh so rarely broken up delusional now-and-agains... after the voices the world was not the same because they'd been coffee-house real

A place in the sun

Night shift thoughts
Gold cherry

Love is lacking

LAC stands for looked after child.
Cherry

The Burning

This happened last friday, and still it smokes...

please hold my hand....

please hold my hand. treat me with kid gloves, my baby. and please feed me love. i'm tired and hungry, and want to curl up with you. smell your hair, and feel your love. fall asleep my baby.

...stay still

fighting and grinding and i'll never stay still. sleeping and waking, i'll never stay still. i'm sick and contorted and twisted and ill and i'll never sleep for wake

three simple words...

Three simple words are still so hard for me so i speak my actions while my heart lays in fractions and my head's in a stew but i can sit and write i. love. you.

Almost Summer

summer to me is a blonde moment: my kids, Daniel and Samuel love to catch hermit crabs the beach is rolling and rolling and rolling -many breasts of the sea breathing- rocking
Cherry

All my seasons of grass

with Wimbledon just round the corner it got me thinking and reminiscing..

A trickle of blood.

There was a hollow where his eyes once sat. And the windows to his soul had gone. Left behind? Lost? Or stolen? A fingerprint at the scene of the crime... A trickle of blood

Lets not start again!

Let's not start again start afresh like linen washed. Let's not pause time with kisses from heaven soft, tender and oh so divine let's not! Let's deal with life, love and longingness

*Riddled with Hurt and Distrust*.

Watching as you become less of a person than you once were. Hating that i won't not sure, if it's can't get involved. I want to help fix you if i can. Unsure.

The Ant Rocks

A long-awaited exchange Of mutual existence Recalls a name, long-forgotten But instantly familiar. As children, thrown unceremoniously Into holidays and grandparents,
Gold cherry

Mr Hocking

The secret ingredient In Mr. Hocking’s case Was a thick West Country accent And the crystal clear conviction That it was the seaweed above all else Which made his ice cream the best,

my bad acid trip

hold my gun my bad acid trip and all's twisted straight. my favorite nightmare is monday gone right dreaming of fearing contortions of fun mind games find games

feel the smell of rain.

distracting scratching and i'm craving more disturbing unnerving it's number four not mine and not yours i'm losing the score a token to the broken mr valium whore take off the sting

Braille scars

the scars on the inside are made of braille. you can touch and feel but you cannot see and these scars yes, the ones on the outside i wear long sleeves and high heels

small city walking

looking three ways as I cross the first street, angles ahead for my eyes to meet, dogs that aren't friendly and dogs that are, dogs with their heads out the windows of cars

*memories destined to be blurred*.

it's busy again and i'm all alone my friend. passing glances fallen glasses casting watchful eyes over blurry eyed dirty minds. trousers betwixt waist and wasted speech slurred

just a flagrant disregard of the english language

poor grammar and sloppy punctuation weave through my lines. like the commotion in my head. and, i am not sure weather i write with a lack of knowledge/ education or verse

The last and the first

The bed is warm but not with you not a haven for love and dreams anymore it's too monstrous even for me but when we were together we filled it with smiles and tea my darling i cry before z's

A breath of you

from you lifts me up as on a cloud. I try to get up from days of depression low low self-esteem, I want to yawn the day away... I couldn't care less about the world, then you speak to me

a cola poem

it tastes so good like capitalist nirvana, swishing it around like a pretty one-night stand, but it comes in a box on-demand without the long wait under a Bodhii tree the trouble is:

Young and in love

she was in love mmm

Scared (part 2)....

get me chocolate get me cake please or a fizzy drink i feel faint too much preparation for bad news specialists and nurses i can't stop thinking about you empty yet hurt the separation

Scared (part 1)....

Cross legs.... Sat here. All alone. With the squelch of squeaky clean heels. All knowing glances walk by. Mumbled chatter and loose phone rings, disturb my thought. I'm trying to stay calm,

Feed me whiskey

Feed me whiskey by the bottle cocaine by the gram feed me some more buffer this hurt somehow feed me more and more and more i don't need a ticket for this wagon just a henry sized score

Wait

For my daughter
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Cherry

Lindsay

I don’t know why, Lindsay, but last night, smoking in the stone cloisters of the quadrangle, I thought of you.
Cherry

The Invisible Hand

It is not from the benevolence of the butcher, the brewer, or the baker that we expect our dinner...

my porcelain queen

this horrible, horrible dream that i'm living i can't wake up from this vile, disgusting shit that has happened may not be my fault but i have to take the blame i have to take the blame.

Faded like Bad Memories.

coral pink as the sky wakes up flecks of orange powder pepperpotting the east yesterday was ruined trying to build bridges with the one who couldn't care. stone wash blue ozone
Cherry

I wish i had never met you...

not sometimes but every fucking day every hour every minute and every deep breath i inhale i wish i had never ever met you and then i could sleep i could count sheep

Nothing compares to you

this isn't a parody or a late night pissed up sing a long. Nothing compares to you.

conversation taste sour.

shut up! just shut the fuck up. my nerves are frayed can't deal with this shit can't fix this stupid head of mine can't cope with the emptiness leave me alone vacate this space i hold dear.

I think you spoke to my eyes?

Not comfortable Not happy too many people stupid questions and i don't want conversation i think you spoke to my eyes for you have moved. Still not comfortable Still not happy

nothing will go wrong

blink. and i'm gone one is not sure weather to apologise. to go. hold tight i'll be fine nothing will go wrong.

I Remember....

This was composed as an exercise at a monthly writing group I attend - a friend whose opinions I value suggested it might stand up on its own!

the artist walks alone

a life of ravaged relationships and forgotten names once held dear, a life of conflict and a life of fear... forging a small new world against the grain, always against the grain

Not me

in this crazy world what are doing why are you looking for something more then this now i have said this many a time now it not the right time to think about mucking up our life now

lost friendship. failed love.

i wish upon another star but i know it won't hold dear lost friendship failed love the days go by like pages of a shakespeare sonnet and a glass of the fine stuff over and over again.

ah number thirteen

ah number thirteen unlucky for some unlucky for one this angel will brush down it's wings spread it's dreams breathe in a deep sigh fly. sweet number thirteen etched upon my skin

The End of the Tunnel

When will I see it? This supposed light At the moment I’m lost in perpetual night I do need to find it I need that release I must find a way for this darkness to cease

sour taste of your pre-emptive hurt.

You never know what you've got till you lost it you never knew what you had and you lost me bitter and sharp like battery acid as it ate through my heart ignorance may be bliss

Yoou go tmy fire going

heys omeone give up on love and mmm you never knon what it hits again enjoy .

Four corners of the mind

Down in the earth there's a fiery place with miniature people holding mass, they move around in pairs and carry torches of flames with them wherever they roam.

A Korean-American Princess 3

The phone conversation is paraphrased: "Hello... Grace." "Hello. Who is this?" "I'm going to hang up the phone," Jack says. "Don't. Don't. Just talk to her," I plea.
Cherry

time to go home

"That sounds like the carer's car" says his Dad.

A Korean-American Princess 2

I want to say something to her. I want to tell her she's beautiful. I want to tell her that I want her?

A Korean-American Princess

I don't really understand it and I really don't know if there is anything to understand. Am I obsessed?

Sunday

mm i think eveyrone sunday can be like this weather kids or hubby andwives we all go crazy or lazy on a sunday smile ,