Parcel for you...Part 13

 

After the update, Vanessa received another email from Cybermate Worldwide, advising her from now on to only place her husband on low functional settings in exceptional circumstances. This was to avoid software regression or the development of cyber conformable mental health issues; the likes of which were, according to the manufacturer, starting to spring up among the ever-increasing robotic companion community. She was a bit sceptical about whether to take this advice on board or not. Perhaps it was a way to control her rather than Spencer.

 

A small community of people with cyber spouses was emerging on social media. Vanessa wasn’t really into Facebook, she had an account but it was only to see what her daughter was up to but she had become aware of this growing movement of support groups. There was a part of her which was curious to learn about the main themes of their discussions, common issues and worries but she suspected they might lean towards debased themes.

 

It occurred to her that having a robot as a husband wasn’t really so different. There were support groups online for people in all sorts of relationships with all sorts of people, divulging deeply personal information and receiving advice from total strangers. Vanessa was a private person and although she felt a bit alone, she didn’t want to devalue her spouse to a type, model number 23 and issues relating to it. She felt that in order for her relationship to work, it was even more important for her to see her husband as an individual than if he were made from real flesh and blood.

 

She was giving Spencer small amounts of time each day to peruse the web under supervision, directing him towards factual websites about the natural world, quizzes or number games which he loved or some light window shopping. The time came when she had to leave him alone for the first time since his update. He was a bit different now, a bit more sophisticated and more likely to steer himself into unchartered territory. She had been careful to ensure there were no banking or payment details stored on the laptop since his enthusiasm for games could easily overlap into real gambling.

 

‘I need to go out for a medical appointment this morning, Spencer. I won’t be long.’

 

‘What? Can I come?’

 

‘No, I’m afraid not. I’d have to leave you in the waiting room and that might cause problems. There’s usually a lot of older people crammed in and they’ll all stare at you.’

 

Spencer smiled and shrugged. ‘I don’t mind,’

 

‘You’ll be fine here. Don’t venture out please, stay in here. I’ve fed the cat and you’ve got your laptop. I’ve set something up for you to watch, a nature programme. It’s all about Botswana. I think you’ll like it and it’s just over an hour long so I’ll be back by the time it’s finished and if it’s not then just stick to the rules that we discussed, happy search criteria, you know the ones to avoid.’

 

Spencer opened the laptop and immediately became engrossed in what was on the screen. He turned up the volume and as Vanessa left the room, she could hear the sounds of exotic birds and a calming voice over. She felt reassured that he would remain fixated and therefore relatively safe from harm. 

 

The doctor’s surgery was running late as usual. She sat in the waiting room staring at the screen, willing it to display her name with an audible beep but several names were displayed before hers. By the time she got back home, an hour and a half had gone by.

 

She returned to find Spencer in hysterics, she had never seen him laugh so hard. He threw his head back and guffawed at whatever was on the screen. After feeling stressed, it was a relief to see him happy with no harm done. Vanessa began to laugh too which was preposterous because she didn’t even know what he was laughing out but his giggling was somehow contagious, 

 

‘Spencer, are you on Youtube? What are you watching?’ He half shook his head but didn’t look at her. ‘Cats, people falling over?’ she laughed.

 

‘No, I’m on HotUKDeals.’

 

‘Oh yes…I’ve heard of that one. It’s meant to be good but what on earth is so funny about the deals?’

 

‘No, it’s not the deals, it’s the chat, the banter.’

 

 

‘Banter?’

 

‘Yes, there’s a barbeque on here for a hundred and forty four pounds and some guy said it’s worth double that and it even comes with a set of sturdy utensils and then,’ he laughed, ’another guy said he was going to buy it but it doesn’t come with a gas canister and then another guy said he was going to buy it but..ha ha, but it doesn't come with any kebab sticks and then another guy said, it doesn’t come with any sausages.’

 

Vanessa cocked her head and frowned as she removed her jacket. ‘Oh, that’s funny, I suppose. Did you enjoy the documentary?’

 

Spencer didn’t answer. He wasn’t laughing now or even smiling, he had his face very close to the screen and appeared lost in concentration.

 

‘Spencer!’

 

‘What?’

 

‘The documentary, did you enjoy it?’ Vanessa sidled up behind him. To her astonishment there was an image of a very scantily clad woman on the screen. ‘And what’s that?’ she said calmly.

 

‘It’s HotUKDeals, I thought I told you that. There’s a deal on, fifty percent off at Intimissimi, it’s underwear, knickers but they’re tiny and such thin fabric, maybe that’s why they’re so cheap. Lots of people are commenting on the woman in the photos, it’s the most popular page. Someone said that his wife looked like that in 1997 but now she looks like a fat pig, someone else said he thinks the woman in the photo is his daughter’s best mate and then someone said, he would like to f…’

 

‘No I don’t want to hear about that!’ Vanessa snapped.

 

Spencer looked up at her shocked and said sheepishly, ‘I didn’t think this website was one of the ones you said to avoid. It’s just a shopping website.’

 

‘I know but…things can descend when you have lots of men together.’

 

Spencer shut the laptop. ‘Well I had to stop watching the Botswana documentary because the baboons were evil.’

 

‘Mmm, yes there might be some truth in that, chimpanzees too, they can be nasty.’

 

‘All primates are inherently evil.’ Spencer said matter of factly. 

 

Vanessa was a little shocked. He was probably right but why was he saying it, had he been on some website, why had he come to this conclusion. ‘I don’t think gorillas are that bad,’ she said, ‘or orangutans, they’re nice, they’re meant to be gentle like humans.’

 

‘Humans are the worst,’ he said, ‘they’re even worse than baboons.’